chapter 17

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For past few hours I am sitting in the garden, reading a book. I have been thinking about what happened yesterday. I am not sure what happened yesterday was right or wrong. I feel it was right but at the same time something in me is telling me it was wrong. I shouldn't have let him come closer to me. He has anger issues and he has forced me into this marriage, everything he has done is wrong but why I am getting pulled towards him. I feel good in his presence but at the same time I also fear him. He always gets angry on minuscule things. Every maid and every guard here is afraid of him. I know he tries to control his anger around me, he is trying.

When I think it through I always come to one conclusion that he is not the ONE for me. What I wanted in my partner is nothing like him. I don't want him. Once dad will wake up, we would go back to our home. I have to keep this in my mind and not let myself getting closer to him. It will hurt both of us at the end. But the problem is whenever he is close I forget everything, I just want to be with him. He is changing something in me and its beyond my understanding.

"Tesoro" I heard him calling me, I look back to see him standing behind me at some distance. It looks like he have been standing there for a while.

"Its getting cold here, let's go inside" he said.

Again this care, he treats me like I am some kind of a fragile doll. I like being cared but all my life I have my dad doing the same and I don't want it from anyone else.

"No, I want to stay here for a bit longer. I like being here" I said looking down at my hands.

It's getting boring staying here. Maids do all the work, they never let me help them and the time I spent with my dad makes me sad. He is not waking up, I am now getting fed up. So I come here occassionally to calm my nerves.

"Do you want to go out with me?" He asked.

"Really you will take me out?" I look at him abruptly and said with excitement.

"Yes wherever you want to" he said.

"Okay" I said happily and stood up.

"Let's go" I said with a wide smile and hold his arm pushing him with me towards the front door. He slightly chuckle at my reaction.

When we reach near the car he opened the car door for me and I sat in the passenger seat. Then he walk around the car to sit on the driver seat. He look towards me and buckle the seat belt for me which I forget to buckle in my excitement.

"Where do you want to go tesoro?" He asked as he started driving.

I started thinking but I don't even know in which city we are. I never asked anyone and no one ever told me about it either. Yes I am stupid, what you can expect.

"Um.. where are we?" I asked and he look towards me amused.

"Rome, Italy" he said.

"Whatttt we are in Italy" I said shockingly, I never thought we would be that far from home. So there was no point of me escaping because I would have never got to home if I have ran from him.

"Yes love" he said slightly smiling at my reaction.

"I always wanted to come to Italy. I was fascinated by this city. I only know it from the books so I don't know where to go. You can take me wherever you want to" I told him.

He smile at me and continue driving. I look outside through the window at everything that passes through.
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We spent whole day exploring the city, he took me to so many famous places and I jumped around like a kid. He told me about italy and it's history. For the first time in my life I felt free. I am outside in this world, not inside the walls of my home. I am walking freely in the streets with him by my side holding my hand. This is like a dream, I don't want to wake up.

Now we are sitting in a beautiful hotel. The menu is in italian so I don't know what to order. I tried to read it again and again but failed to understand so I put the menu down and sighed frustrated. I look up to see Xander hiding his smile.

"Can I order for you?" He asked.

"Yes please" I said.

He ordered for both of us. I look around to ignore the uncomfortable silence between us. This hotel is really extravagant and all the people here look like they are rich.

"This place is so beautiful" I said breaking the silence.

"I am delighted you like it" he said.

"Thankyou for taking me out. I have never been to anywhere apart from my grandma's farmhouse" I told him slightly laughing at the end, I don't know why I share this with him but I feel like I can talk to him about anything.

"What do you mean you have never been out of your home?" He asked.

"Yes but it wasn't always like that. After my mother death, my father took me to another city and we started living there. He never let me out of our home, I was homeschooled. " I told him.

When I look at him he was in deep thoughts. His forehead was turned into a deep frown.

"Hey what happened?" I asked him.

"Nothing" he said coming out of his deep thoughts.

"Did your father ever told you why he never let you out?" He asked.

"No, not really but I know he has his reasons and its connected to my mother's death. She was murdered but nobody tell me anything about it. I know they are hiding something from me" I said with slightly cracked voice. I know if I keep talking about my mother I will end up crying and I don't want to end this day crying. To my relief waiter came with our food. After that none of us talked and we ate in silence.




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