Broken bond

Chapter 19

Cal

I am in complete shock at what has just come out of her mouth. In all my life, I never would have thought that those words would come out of this stubborn and determined woman. I'm just. . .I don't even know how to feel. And the drunken smile on her face doesn't help with the emotions I'm trying to figure out.

"E-Excuse me?" I stutter for a second, making sure I heard her correctly.

"I am a rape baby," she repeats as if it was nothing.

I didn't think I could be baffled again by the same statement but I was wrong. I still can't believe her words but it seems that I don't have time to process them.

"My mother was a human and my "father" - a ruthless warrior of his pack - loved her with all his heart since she was his mate. But he only loved her because she could give him an heir. She refused to give her virginity up so easily so he decided to just take it."

Her story has me focused on her, every detail leaving a sour taste in my mouth on what could be said next.

"He wanted a son but was outraged when my mother had me instead And, as far back as I can remember, he would abuse my mother and I mercilessly, to no end. My mother was my only hope for a better future and she loved me despite everything I was. The abuse didn't matter to me as long as I had her."

Raven unexpectedly turns her head and faces me; her smile small and no longer filled with intoxicated joy but with longing and melancholy.

"What happened to your mother?" I hesitantly ask, as she has been silent for a while.

"My "father" killed her."

I couldn't believe her words again for the third time this night. Every word that comes out of her mouth feels like a bad dream.

"She had refused to give him another child because she was afraid that he'd hurt it too. He lost his temper and ripped out her throat. All I can really remember from that day was my pleading screams to save her while my "father" beat me for shedding tears over her."

Her face holds so much sorrow but that sad smile still remains like a scar.

"When I turned five, my "father" hooked up with the pack slut and she gave him a son. She disappeared a year later while my half-brother stayed with us. I remember being very envious at first about how that baby got all my "father's" love while I only received his hate ."

"What was your brother's name?"

Her smile widens as she takes a long sip from the bottle before answering,"Frankie and he was my whole world. He gave me hope again and I cherished him. I still got abused every, single day but Frankie made everything bearable. He was the reason I stopped cutting myself. I had always believed that my "father" would never lay a hand on his precious son but I was wrong."

In anger, she throws the bottle at the wall in front of us. It shatters in to many sharp tiny shards and creates an ear-piercing sound,"He put a scar on my brother's face and all he wanted to do was bring me food! How could he do that to someone so kind?"

Her smile has fully disappeared now and all that is left is a pained and angered expression.

"I couldn't take it anymore after that so I-I killed him!"

My eyes widen at this horrifying truth but I also don't blame her. After everything that happened, she deserved peace with her brother.

"I beat that sorry excuse until he was nothing but a bloody corpse. Then I took Frankie and we left. We started our new life together as rogues and it was perfect. Well, it was perfect, until some other rogues came and attacked us. All I could think about was protecting Frankie but it was hard when I was losing so much blood. I thought I was going to die that day if it wasn't for Harry, Thomas and Sam saving us. We were like a family after that and I was always happy with them."

She smiles and it makes me smile too. I don't know why but I've always loved the way she smiles. Unfortunately, it fell and a look of sadness replaced it.

"But, in one brief moment, everything I ever loved and cared about was snatched away from me a-and I couldn't do anything about it. We were all out running and we had just shifted back when an evil Alpha and his pack surrounded us and took us to his dungeon. We weren't even on his territory, just outside the border. But he said that since we were rogues, we were guilty for something. It didn't matter how many times we told him he was wrong about us, he still tortured us. He tortured us until we bled before leaving us for the next day. Frankie couldn't take it and when he started to cry during one of his torture sessions. . ."

She stops, her mind seeming to wander off as she spaces out. But, the sadness reflecting in her cognac brown eyes is absolutely heart-breaking and almost indescribable.

"What happened?" I asked softly.

A single tear slides down her cheek All her pain and sorrow was in that tiny tear and it made tears appear in my own eyes which somehow haven't fallen yet.

"They killed him by pouring hot silver all over his body. His screams were agonising and I couldn't save him! I had sworn to protect my little brother and in the end I failed! I-I was dead and numb to the world after that but the boys were filled with rage. They started the rebellion and we all joined, breaking free from our cages and killing anyone that got in our way, including that fucking Alpha. We got separated at some point but promised to meet back at the tree we had made our home. So I waited for them there. I waited for a whole week but they never came; I was eighteen years old and entirely alone. I had always believed that they were dead and so I made a promise to keep on living, not just for myself but for my family that could no longer spend a day in the sun and for my mate. Six years later, I found you."

She looks over at me with a beautiful smile on her face but it quickly fades as she whispers,"But you didn't want me. I was so happy to meet you and I would have done anything for you if you had asked me but you rejected me."

Suddenly, her tears begin to overflow and she shakes her head as she lifts it up and screams,"Why was rejection even created!?"

She then looks at me and she suddenly throws her arms around me as she cries her heart out. She's been hurting for so long and I just added to her pain, what kind of a monster am I? I feel soft and calloused hands gently take a hold of my face and I see Raven give me a breathtaking smile and I would do anything, even kill myself, just to keep that smile on her face.

"But, now I know why you hate me because of what happened to your sister. I am truly sorry about that. Just know that not all rogues are horrible, some are just victims of circumstance. And, even though you are always so mean to me and you break my heart constantly, some part of me will always love you."

Please, just say it.

"I love you too, Raven."

Without thinking, I plant my lips on hers. She leans into the kiss as I wrap my arms around her. In that moment, I let go of everything that had been holding me back from her. I let go of the pain and anger that had permanently clouded my heart after my sister's death as I lifted Raven into my arms. All I wanted to do in this moment was comfort her. To give her the love she had been denied for so long. I didn't believe this would mend what I had done to our relationship but I knew I couldn't let her hurt like this anymore.

Two years ago, when I had first laid my eyes on her, I had fallen head over heels in love. But when I realised she was a rogue, I couldn't find it in me to accept her. That decision had kept me awake until the early hours of the day for the two whole years we were apart. I had so much longing and guilt and I couldn't pretend that the love I felt for her wasn't there. It had always been there, I just refused to let it out.

As I lay her on my bed, she takes off her shirt and I stare at her in awe while adoration swirled in her eyes. She was so beautiful in this moment. She pulled me closer to her, kissing me once more and I released a growl against her lips. We were soon naked, entangled in each other's arms and that is how we spent the whole night together; a night full of passion.