Vulnerable: Book 1 of the Magic Mutations Series | ✓

45: Always

Erica and Jayce had come home. I had washed our dishes. I had a shower. I even watched a couple of episodes of a show on my laptop in bed. Eventually, I decided to give in and turned out the light, eyes blinking into the darkness for a couple of moments when finally the door to the bedroom opened.

The hallway light filtered in momentarily before it closed behind him. The noises told me he was taking off his clothes as he climbed into bed, pulling me into his arms.

"How did it go?" I asked.

"You're still up? Or did I wake you?"

"Only just turned the light off."

His lips pressed against my forehead. "It was fine."

"You were gone forever. Did you two make up?"

"We did."

"And? What did you talk about?"

He was quiet.

"Ben?"

"That's between me and Lukas."

"I'm not allowed to know?"

"I know I said I wouldn't keep things from you but I promised him this one... He doesn't want you to know this. It's not about your safety or anything."

I went quiet as I mulled it over, wary of whether I could trust him. "Can I have a clue? Or some inkling of why you two spent two and a half hours talking it out?"

"It's just... some girl drama."

Suddenly I breathed a sigh of relief. "Lukas has a crush on someone?"

"Yes. I know you two are now apparently besties," he said bitterly, "But he's not ready to... he doesn't want to tell you about it."

My stomach sank momentarily as the final blow hit. It was the ultimate confirmation that whatever I assumed had passed between us the other day was wrong. Because Lukas had a crush on another girl... and it wasn't me. And it couldn't be Erica. So who was it?

Mistaking my sadness for worry about my friend, Ben held me tighter. "It's not that he doesn't trust you. He just doesn't want it to be a thing. He's not interested in dating so he's waiting for it to pass."

"Because of what happened with Erica?"

"That and... some other things."

I bit my lip and buried my head into Ben's neck, enjoying the smell of his skin and hair overcoming me. 

In that moment, I let the final shreds of hope and sparks that may have occurred within me for Lukas drift away as I sunk into my partner by my side. It was easy to be moved by Lukas because he was such a great guy. But in the end he wasn't the one who had won my heart. And he wasn't the person who loved me. And he wasn't the person I met in that library and had bonded to. That guy was by my side, holding me in his arms right now. That guy fought with me terribly hard just because he was scared I might die from getting into his world. That guy let go of every fear and thing he held onto, giving into my wishes, just because he was too scared I would leave him.

"I'm sorry," I whispered.

"You have nothing to be sorry for. But what's bothering you?"

"I shouldn't have threatened to break up with you."

He sighed and pulled away. I knew he was looking at me, but I couldn't see him.

A small part of me in that moment began to wonder if maybe there was some magic trick I would be able to do to improve my night vision, but as quickly as the thought came, I let it go. We had other issues at hand right now.