The Girl On Drugs

~3~

'No one knows my struggles they only see me trouble it's hard to carry when no one loves
~Tupac Shaqur 🌹💔

I gasped for air, my high left my body my state was so weak. Still I left although I wanted to cry so bad. He dropped me and slapped me so hard I tasted blood. Reem rushed towards my assistance "Little baby you good. Let me go handle this okay" I shook my head no and I spit up blood and got up. "I'm good on this, this don't have anything to do with you" he shook his head "You must never meant a real man, this nigga ain't gonna hit you I'm about to beat his ass. I do t give a damn if you don't think it's my business." He semi yelled and Quan walked up towards me and Reem blocked him.

"You wanna keep your ass pretty dumb ass nigga I'm gonna need you to step off my girl " I smiled at him calling me his girl. I like that but I ain't like this. "She was my girl blood. But she like to kill off people seeds, running away from niggas and getting high all the time like she just don't give a fuck" he growled. I rolled my eyes trying to fight off the tears. "Look nigga I can already tell your young ass a scrub and she just ain't wanna have your scrub ass baby. You can't take care of her or no child she probably realized that most of the shit you got her was fake or stolen man. You a punk ass nigga and you'll never have a girl like her ever have your kids. Matter of fact bitch she pregnant right now with mines" Reem said.

Wait , what , what the fuck he just say. He's actually defending me like I deserve better than Quan dumb ass. I do and I did just until I get done with this, these working for Rell shit. That's possible but I'll never get done with my fixes. I looked up too see Reem punching the shit out of Quan. Yeah , I hate Quan and he's a ass hole and he raped me multiple times just so I can end up pregnant. I ain't wanna see him go out like this, well I did but the dumb ass in me said "Don't let Reem kill him he'd have to do time for this nigga and ain't worth it. You ain't worth it " I hurried over to Reem.

"Reem don't kill him. He ain't worth it baby" he just kept going and Quans face was just getting bloodier. That's when I decided to put my own self at risk and charged at Reem shoving him away from Quan. Quan is short for RâQuan , but that's besides the point. My rib cage was hurting afterwards because I ran straight until his elbow. I winced in pain and looked over at Ráquan "This ain't over stupid little bitch" he said as he coughed up blood. "Fuck you I saved your life" I said feeling myself being lifted by Reem. His face was sweaty and his skin was burning hot. He carried me bridal style and I just stared into the unknowing void of his emotions that was there in the peak of his eyes.

I watched how heavy his breaths was and I didn't speak too him I just thanked him with my actions. Something hit me a memory from I was little that reminded me of today , of Reem. Someone that I love and hate more than anyone, my father.

Flash Back

I watched my daddy sniff up that weird white stuff with that crazy white ho that stayed around the corner. At least that's what momma used to call her, I was just eight years old unaware of everything going on. Still thinking of how Daddy said my mommy is sick is which why she can't come out of their room. But mommy took me in every night she give me kisses and holds me tight singing to me the same melody by India Arie 'get it together' my momma always told me too play that song when I was feeling down and needed some motivation. I haven't heard her sweet voice in a while, and I was getting tired.

I snuck upstairs knowing daddy didn't want me too cause mommy was sick. But it was worth being sick my mommy voice sounded like an Angels she told me she's my angel, my guardian angel. I knocked on there door quietly, I didn't hear a sound. I knocked again just a little louder knowing daddy would beat me till I'm black and blue if he caught me disobeying him. My momma sometimes would take it and I'll cry but my momma always told me it was her job of being my guardian angel.

I cried thinking if daddy made mommy sick and I slowly entered the room. It stunk really bad, it smelt like the sewer I saw my momma and my traveling back threw on the bed, but I didn't see mommy."mommy" I whispered I couldn't hear her response. Maybe she was sleep but she wasn't on the bed. I walked into the bathroom where the smell got worst. I felt as if I was going to throw up. But I felt like mommy was in here I felt as if she was in here. I opened the door and fell to the floor.

Blood, blood was every where all over the bath tub and walls. My mommy was face was purple and pale. I understood God took my momma back for himself. He wanted to stop my angel from hurting. Tears poured from my eyes "I wanna go to beautiful, beautiful " I said singing my mothers favorite song I moved closer. I stroked her pretty brown hair her green eyes were died out and closed. I saw her hand prints on the wall. I couldn't scream cause it would be me next my daddy was high. I had too leave.

When my daddy was arrested days later after I told our neighbor he looked at me , his eyes bloodshot red. "You took my angel" I screamed crying "I'm a real man little bitch ain't nothing that belong to a man can be taken away from him. I'm a real man your mother wasn't use to that" I shook my head. Not understanding real man, your a real killer. '

Today I understood what my father meant, yet i would forever hate him. Nobody wanted me my mother was out of full contact with her family and his was all crack fiends. Men are all possessive , men all want to have that owner ship and possession about something knowingly its there's and they have full control over it. My daddy didn't kill my mother cause he hated her , he killed her because without him he wouldn't be like a man. He'd kill for what was trying to steer her away from him , which just happened to be myself. Reem was going to kill Quan , the reason was similar it's because Reems a man, a proud black man.

So some how I understand his anger, but I don't. Reem doesn't really care for me. We got in the car and guess where he laid me. Right in the front passenger seat by him and he got in. I felt my mother I felt her energy and I smiled tears rolling down from my eyes . My hands rested on my thighs I started singing 'he heals me by India Arie' Reem placed his hands over mines and pulled off. "I apologize " I mumbled to him when he was done "it's not your fault I should've never got out of hand I still was gonna beat that nigga ass either way it went" I chuckled at him. Inside it was like my heart was crunching burning. I felt my mother and I kept feeling her, she was still my guardian angel just not close enough to guard anymore. I looked around in my purse.

There, no more I thought as I swallowed the rest of my relaxer. My heart sank but still I couldn't feel that full high I could only feel her. Although once it was kicking in she the as fading away. We pulled up at a hotel. "You wanna stay the night here and go swimming" he asked my eyes bolted up with energy after all I was still just a kid. Just so lost , so very lost and so very gone, to the point where I can be in front of you and you couldn't find out who I was, who I am. But you would know the drugs who I turn into when there in me. I'm fearless I'm powerful unstoppable and fun.

"Reem I don't have a swim suite what I'm gonna swim in and I don't wanna swim right now I just wanna lay up" I mumbled to him as was walk my up to the desk. He smiled at me as he talked to the white lady at the desk, after me consistently rolling my eyes and scanning for a mony target they was finally done talking. "Yes let's go" I said and I danced to the elevator. "What floor?" I asked him "penthouse suite here stick the card in"🌺😴 awe hell he must think he getting some pussy. I swiped the card. And guess what the room was beyond beautiful but we didn't even fuck. We sat and talk an laughed and watched movies. Ordering room service. "Aye baby momma" he said referring to his confrontation with Quan earlier,

I laughed "yes baby daddy" I said looking up to him I was laying on his chest. "Let's go to bed we been up for hours I wanna call it a day " I smiled at him and got under the blanket with him. We cuddled with each other and my high was dying off so I was getting sleepy."good night baby momma I love you" and that's were his pretending part came in." I love you too baby daddy" i said smiling, although it was a lie. It still feels good to hear I love you. The last person who told me that was my angel.

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💟🌿 I feel good about this one next chapter in two days it's going to be longer 😈 be ready