Wakey Wakey (a Splatoon x Male Human Reader story)

The New Squidbeak Splatoon

(y/n) pov

???: THE OCTARIANS ARE COMING!

Me: The what!?!?

???: AGAINNNNNNNNNNNN!

Me: what the hell are you talking about, man?

???: Oh, uh, hi... Did we do this before? The ol' noggin ain't what it used to be.

Me: no, I don't think we have, so who are you?

Cuttlefish: The names Cuttlefish, Senior advisor to the New Squidbeak Splatoon, at your service.

Me: 'Splatoon? Like Platoon? Is he trying to make me join the army?'

Cuttlefish: that look in your eyes... It's the look I've been lookin' for... Wait nevermind, that's confusion... Wait there it is, Determination!

Me: Determination...

Cuttlefish: the Great Zapfish that powers Splatsville has been squidnapped!

Me: so that's why the power cut out this morning?

A magazine flew by with the Great Zapfish's face on it.

Cuttlefish: it's the Octarians again. You can bet your bottom sand dollar on it!

Me: wait so, what do you mean by "again"?

Cuttlefish: you see, the Great Zapfish has gone missing before. Twice, in fact! And those Octojerks were behind both times.

Me: so what happened?

Cuttlefish: I've been keepin' an eye on 'em even though I'm technically retired. And with eyes like these, there ain't much that escapes me!

Me: but?

He looks down a bit disappointed.

Cuttlefish: but they still made it off with the Great Zapfish. And now WE'VE got to get it back. Right?

.

.

.

Me:... Huh?

Cuttlefish: that was a job offer, kid, the pay is...zero...but you might just save the world. You're in, right? RIGHT!?!

me: ok, ok! Fine, I'm in!

Cuttlefish: 'K kid! Starting today, you are Agent 3 of the New Squidbeak Splatoon!

He hands me a yellow suit and a gun called the "Hero Shot".

Cuttlefish: this is the brand new Hero Suit! It'll help you fight Octarians.

Hero Suit...

I put it on and it fits pretty well, it's not to tight, but it's not loose, it's a bit baggy, but that's fine.

Cuttlefish: Now, let's go get these Octoclowns. I'm counting on you, buck- OH!

I see Small Fry wandering around and looking at the terrain.

Cuttlefish: you've already got another agent with ya, huh? Well, I'm fresh outta hero suits, unfortunately...

Small Fry then starts running around Cuttlefish.

Cuttle: Ah, but it's a salty li'l scamp, ain't it? It'll do fine.

Cuttlefish starts thinking

Cuttlefish: Now, where was I... Oh, right! Let's go get those Octojerks! I'm counting on you, bucko!

He points in the direction of a ramp downwards. I avoid the fuzzy ooze. I see some crates, and a wall of fuzzy ooze with a glowing ball made of the ooze on top of the wall.