Rodrick and Y/N waltz into the kitchen dramatically, backpacks slung over their shoulders. Rodrick puts bread into their shiny red toaster and sits in a wooden chair next to his girlfriend.
"There you guys are! I need to talk to you all." Susan says, motioning Greg over to the kitchen. The three teenagers rush to leave.
"See you, Mom!"
"Bye, mom!"
"Later Susan!"
"Hey, hold on a minute. I really need you all to get along so I have a method I want to try out." The kids all sigh in annoyance.
Susan pulls out a stack of colorful Monopoly money. "Your dad and I have been talking and we've decided that things have gotten out of hand." Susan sighs, leaning towards the kids in front of her, "We want you to realize that having a brother is one of the most important relationships in your life."
Susan sighs, "I mean think about it you're gonna be Uncle Greg, Uncle Rodrick, and Aunty Y/N to each other's kids!" Rodrick and Y/N look at each other in disgust, they definitely didn't want kids.
"I'm calling it 'Mom Bucks' and it's going to teach you to spend time with each other, and I'll reward you when you do."
"You're paying us with fake money?" Rodrick observes, clearly unamused.
"Ok so for every hour you spend with each other, and yes this includes you Y/N, without fighting." Susan thinks for a second, "For example, let's say you give Greg a drum lesson you each earn a 'Mom Buck." Rodrick purses his lips and shakes his head at the thought of giving his brother a drum lesson. He glances at his girlfriend and rolls his eyes.
"Which you can then trade in for ONE real dollar." Susan finishes, She hands each of the kids a stack of five 'Mom Bucks', "So to start you off, I'm giving you each five 'Mom Bucks', now if you're smart you'll save up your mom bucks." Rodrick shakes his head in distaste.
"Can we cash out now?" Rodrick glances at the girl next to him, who also nods.
"Well, Rodrick if you save."
"But can we cash out?" Susan sighs,
"Yes but-"
"We're gonna cash out." The two pile their small stacks together and hand them back to Susan, who sighs and digs through her wallet for ten spare dollars. She pulls out the green notes and hands them to the kids.
"Thanks." Rodrick says, the two run out the door and into Rodricks van.
•••
"Fuck Rodrick!" Y/n moans out, the two had snuck out of sixth period to have a quicky in the janitors closet.
"You're so good for me baby." The two edge closer to their releases, and finally let go.
"Fuck." The two of them gasp for air as Rodrick pulls out, he pulls his pants back up and helping her with her own pants. The two Edit the closet before ditching school all together and hopping in the van.
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Doesn't Know
Fanfiction"Rule number one, don't be good at something you don't want to do" "This is bad advice." "Rule number two, always lower mom and dads expectations." "Don't...do that." "Rule number three, never do something when someone else can do it for you." "Thi...
