Monaxiá

Part four - scars

Ellas POV:

It's been a week since I met dad again, for me it's only been barley four days; the day I first woke up and met dad again, and the past three days since I woke up from sleeping for basically three days straight.

It's not like anything has happened though, since I woke up I hadn't moved from the bed and dad was scrolling on his phone while holding me as a film was quietly playing on the screen- It's what we've been doing for the past couple days, watching films and scrolling on dads phone at funny dog and cat videos. Not that I've been able to laugh, they are funny but.. I don't know how to express it.

Obviously I can laugh but when I do I feel really really sick- like when I try to smile and talk. Whenever I try do something other than sit and listen quietly I feel an overwhelming sickly sense of fear and anxiety of something bad about to happen- sometimes to the point where I am sick or sobbing as dad only tries to help soothe me.

I feel bad that I'm keeping him here, but I can't walk and when I try to move he says I need to stay in bed and heal. The Charlie-doctor guy said I have a while to go but that I'm healing quickly. He's said my ribs and internal injuries have surprisingly healed a lot In the past week and a half since I've been found and says it's looking like that's going to continue if I rest.

I don't need an iv thing anymore as dads basically been forcing me to drink water and 'magic juice' every two seconds and it helps with making me feel less sicky and groggy. I don't need to throw up every couple minutes or so as I feel like I'm slowly settling into where I am now.

I think- and hope- I'm getting used to not being on the brink of death all of the time. That's not stopping me from still being terrified for seemingly no reason. And dad can see that. He knows I'm scared he can see it in how I can't walk, talk, look at anybody, move, be touched, be hugged, be held, without flinching or starting to tear up and cry.

But it's not stopping him from doing his best in trying to help me and make me feel comfortable.

He's helping a lot and he may not know it yet but he really is.

Just a week ago he was a fuzzy memory but now he's really here and I feel like I'm getting to know my dad again-

-And his family, not many people have walked in except three main people; Charlie, when he comes to check on me and change my bandages and whatever else he does. Alex, my dads older brother who's kind of funny, he and my dad are definitely brothers; They argue and fuss over funny things like shows for us to watch next and who's the best character and so on and then Emily who's my dads eldest brothers wife who brings food for us to eat and sometimes watches an episode or two of a show or series we are watching with us.

Emily's really nice. She's a good cook too- I would eat more of her food if I knew I wouldn't throw it up a couple minutes after. The most I can manage to hold down is a couple bites.

Right now it's ten thirty six pm and dads turning the telly off.

"Let's get to bed hm?" Be asks taking a hold of my hand and picking me up from bed. after I do my business he walks back in and smiles, picking me up he brings me close enough to wash my hands in the sink while still being far enough away from the bathtub.

In the past couple days since I woken up he's been trying to make me more comfortable with the sink and bathtub. It's been going well with the sink, if the waters low and dads beside me I can wash my hands but it's another story with the bathtub.

Yesterday he tried to get me to sit beside the bathtub and maybe even put my hand in with a little bit of water sat at the bottom of it, but as he tried to help me walk over I couldn't help but try and get away.