Plus Size Prisoner of Society

Parade

AN: this is dedicated to my best friend. Although I can't take on any of your pain and lighten your load, I hope these words capture a fraction of how you feel so that myself and my readers can help you to feel a little less alone.

A hundred feet from you
But feels like a world apart
Two strangers in a crowd
That once shared one heart

I know you can see me
And yet you look away
Watching the parade
Like it's any other day

I spotted you
The moment I arrived
I froze in my place
"Should I say hi?"

My heart sank
I didn't know what to do
I was wondering
If you felt the nerves too

You've seen me naked
Stomach thighs and all
And yet standing before you
Is making me feel small

Who are you here with?
Is she skinnier than I?
If I saw you kiss another
It'd make me want to die

Just seeing you alone
Eats at my soul
We were here together last year
Now we're playing different roles

You're the guy who stands alone
I'm the girl who wants the guy
I want all we had back
Maybe I can catch your eye

When I feel you watching
I laugh and I sing
I'm having the time of my life
Like your presence means nothing

But when you look away
My eyes are back on you
You're chilling with your boy
Are you feeling lonely too?

The parade passes by
But I can't focus on a thing
My focus is on you
You were my everything

The two hours passed by
I can't remember one float
Or the dancers or the cars
Just this lump in my throat

This moment is ending
The door's slamming shut
Is this the end?
All that longing for what?

The crowd dispersed
What do we do? Just leave?
There's something still here
Or I'd like to believe...

You turn and you go
Cause the show's finally over
While I get the encore
Crying to find closure

So while I pick up the pieces
Of my shattered heart
It's the end of us
But for me it's a start

I will cry and I'll scream
And it'll hurt
But this time around
I will put myself first

This chapter is over
So I'll set down my pen
And I'll put Amber
Back together again.