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"What in the actual fuck have you done?" Lorelai asks, but I don't have the energy or care to answer her question

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"What in the actual fuck have you done?" Lorelai asks, but I don't have the energy or care to answer her question. I'm kneeling in the dirt by her feet, gripping Cordelia's bracelet in my fist, wishing that this was all just a horrible nightmare.

But it isn't. This is my life. I've made the shitty choices that have led me to this moment where I am holding it together by a thread, with no fucking clue where to go next. Lorelai stoops down next to me and places her hand on my shoulder.

"E, what happened, seriously?" she asks, and her tone is softer now. "I don't understand."

I shake my head and bury my face in my palms, the quartz digging into my forehead. "I fucked it all up, Lore. I fucking promised her I wouldn't let him take her, and I broke that promise. This is all my fault."

"Come on, let's go inside," she says, pulling me up by my elbow. "You need to get out of these clothes, and then we can talk. Okay?"

I allow her to guide me to my feet and into Evermore Manor. Supes crowd the foyer, preparing to return home. They wish me a good morning and ask about Cordelia's whereabouts. I can't find it in me to answer. Instead, I let my best friend do the talking as she leads the way upstairs. When she opens the door to my room, I pause at the threshold. Despair consumes me as I take in the sight of Cordelia's belongings—her robe thrown across my bed, her makeup scattered upon the vanity, and her clothes hanging next to mine in the closet.

"He took her," I say, the hollowness in my tone matching the feeling inside my chest.

"We will find a way to get her back," Lorelai says, pulling out my suitcase from under the bed. "Why didn't you tell her you were soul bonded? I can't believe it was just because you thought it would scare her."

I sit on Cordelia's side of the bed and bring her pillow to my nose. "It wasn't. I panicked when I saw the hurt in her eyes. I was scrambling for the right words to make it better, but Jolene cut me off before I could tell her."

Lorelai empties the dresser drawers onto the bed and folds several of my shirts before saying, "Tell her what?"

"I wanted to protect her. If Cane was truly here, I thought he was here for me. What better way to get to me than by hurting Cordelia. It made sense that he was chasing her through the cemetery, and he pulled her under in the pool. If she knew about our bond, she would learn about the primal bond too. If we completed that..." I shake my head.

"You would have a zenith bond," she says, finishing my thought.

"If Cane kills me, I couldn't put her at risk of dying too. She was better off not knowing that option existed for us."

Lorelai stops packing my clothes in my suitcase and sits beside me. She runs her fingers under my eyes and pulls them away with my crimson tears staining them. "It isn't like you to take away someone's choice in a matter. It is everything you stand against. I have to admit that I understand why you did it, but it wasn't fair to Cora."

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