In the Shadows

Part Nine: the Zenith

    A new year, new semester, a new start. Again.

    At least, that's what I had tried to convince myself. I had a few new classes this semester, including an art class. I was looking forward to spending some time (forcing myself) to do the things I cared about. My parents gifted me a giant new sketchbook for the holidays. I wanted to fill it quickly, looking at the blank pages filled me with guilt. I had been so quiet and distant from my family over the last few months that they hardly tried to make an effort to connect with me at all.

    I accepted my loneliness. This was the plan after all. I meant to keep to myself at the new school, to not let anyone in. Look at what a mistake it was to make friends.

    Since my brother was soon to graduate, we would probably be moving just as soon anyway. I just had to make it to summer.

I spent the majority of the winter break either working at a restaurant down town, or hiding in my room. I had saved up almost enough for the down payment on a used car. I thought about what kind of vehicle I might be driving come summer time when I heard an almost drilling sound.

Bzz-bzz. Bzz-bzz.

My mom recently got herself a new phone, handing down her old one to me. I never used one much before, I never had the need, but seeing as I would be driving and away from home more often, my parents wanted me to be able to check in or call for help. It was a pretty popular model a few years ago, and it wouldn't be my mom's if she didn't cover the case in bling. The pink and silver rhinestones coated the entirety of the outside and inside the flip phone were never ending traces of glitter. Anything my mom touched, sparkled soon after.

Bzz-bzz. Bzz-bzz.

I pulled the small wire cord out of the phone, a green light flashed to indicate a full battery. I opened the phone to see why it was buzzing, the hinges creaked. The small digital screen light up a picture of an envelope that read New Message! I couldn't think of anyone who would know my phone number. But I did know a few people who I prayed would never know it. As I hesitated, I heard Hannah's car pull up out front and honk. Shoving the phone in my pocket, I gave my pet cat a kiss on his round fuzzy head and ran out to the car.

Only Hannah and her little sister were in the car today, a wave of relief came over me. No more snide Katie comments, she was given her own car as a sweet-sixteen gift. The car ride was a bit quieter, only the voices over the radio talked. Jules did her homework in the front seat, Hannah sang quietly along to the music, and I decided to check that new message after all:

'Hey. I know u dont know me. But I saw you around school and wanted to say hi'

Who could this be? Should I reply? Is it some kind of trick? My anxiety rose to the surface yet. Then again, it was only a text message. It couldn't actually hurt me. At this point, talking to one new person can't change that much.

'Hey' I replied, snapping my phone closed. I exhaled quickly through my nose, rolling my shoulders back and down. I tried to release some tension.

Bzz-bzz. They responded already.

Hello :) Ur a sophomore right? Did you go here last year?

Yes, are you?

I'm a Junior. Did u just move?

Over the summer, yeah.

Thats cool. Where r u from?

All over. I move a lot. You?