Life Just Outside The 617

CHAPTER 4 - A Slip Back Into Reality - Got To Pay Those Bills

The next morning, my alarm went off at 6 AM. Why had the last 48 hours had gone by so quickly? This meant Chris was going back up to his neck in the woods today and I wouldn't be seeing him again until the end of the week. Damn my emotions for getting reeled in so quick. Pump those breaks a bit girl.

With the little glow of the nightlight emitting from the bathroom, I turned over to see him lying next to me, still sleeping peacefully. Warmed my heart to see him there and knowing he didn't leave to get ahead of a Monday morning commute. Opting not to work out and wake him up this morning, I quietly crept into the bathroom to brush my teeth, wash my face, fuss with my hair, put it up into a messy bun, threw on a pair of jeans and a Patriots hoodie. Quick application of eye liner and a nude lipstick I was ready to start my Monday morning routine. Albeit a little more gussied up than usual, well need I say why?

I slipped behind my desk and fired up the laptop. Bruin sauntered his way into my office with tiny meows as he approached me. He hopped up and sat up at the corner of my desk – just purring up a storm.

"Hi buddy." I said as I scratched beneath his chin. "Sorry that Mommy's weekend routine was a little off for you. This may or may not be something that you might have to get used to. We shall see." He licked my fingers and continued to seek out my hand for scratches beneath his chin.

Deep down inside, yes, I will admit that my heart was hoping that this would be something for Bruin and me to get used to. If it's meant to be, it's meant to be. If this was a weekend of just lust and fucking, then I guess that's alright too. Or is it really? The age where I am now. I certainly don't want a man to play any games with my heart. I dealt with that off and on in my 20's. And while I was young, it didn't matter to me that much. Because I was at an age where I didn't even know what I wanted out of life like my parents' generation did. I was out there having fun like every other 20 something year olds were doing as well. New generations look at life a lot more differently than the ones before them. Once I entered my 30's. I began to view my life a lot more seriously. And when it did, it happened. I met someone and I settled down with him. Thinking that he was going to be my happily ever after. And at first, he really was, then particular scenarios in life happen and it sometimes makes that other person become someone else. You try to work things out, but when the other person doesn't want to work at change with you. Not willing to compromise or help you figure out what to do and make things better. And when that happens, what can you do? Things unraveled and life moved onward. And my life went straight back to where it all began back up here to Massachusetts. It was an experience in a life I had to go through. And as hard as it was to endure. I saw myself through to the other side of it and began my life where it left off prior to going through all that. I know I'm a happier person for it and I like who I am now.

And from what the past 48 hours have been like with this man. Deep inside, I believe that he isn't a guy who would toy with my emotions like that. There's some mutual acquaintances that we both have. And I'm sure neither of us would want to be like that. I don't know about him, I'm not one who likes to toy with someone like that. And I trust that he must think the same after doing this dating scene for so long and never finding the right one to settle down with. He's the man that millions of women dream about to have in their own lives. And this weekend, he's opted to be with a local gal who hasn't made a big social media footprint in the world out there. Until now. I'm the mystery girl out there that's trending with Chris Evans.

And then it slips in. The anxiety once more as my thoughts go in a million directions of what this past weekend has been for me. I don't know at this point if it was an itch that he just helped me scratch. For he now knows it had been a year, knowing how somewhat desperate I was to feel a man inside me again. Or is he really wanting to seek out trying to form a relationship with some woman out there. Can that woman be me? Big Hollywood A Lister comes back home and meets girl from a small town like his here at home? Fuck, anxiety can really suck and mess with your train of thoughts so badly. Time to clear your head girlfriend before the day really starts to get underway and he's up before you know it.