My Forever

Chapter 1

Alexis POV

Get out now!!! These were the words that flew angrily from my mother's lips,

Firstly because she really hated me and secondly was because I couldn't contribute half of the rent.

I had no where to go, no friends to call,
I have always been an introvert and it's mainly because people were never kind to me and I had resented the world from a tender age.

My hands shook from anxiety just thinking about being homeless in this big city,

I cried I begged her to let me stay but she wasn't having it she wanted her emotionally wrecked daughter out of her sight and she wanted it as soon as possible which was now.

My only hope for protection and peace which would be my dad was gone, I miss him everyday he would have protected me he would have saved me from this thing I call life, I just wish he was here to hold me and tell me everything was going to be ok even if it was far from the truth.

I had no choice there was no chance of getting my mom to change her mind she was as serious as a judge and to save myself the embarrassment of her putting my stuff out on the curb during the day for the neighbors to see I left taking only a small duffel bag with a few necessities in it,

I sat at a bus stop and watch as hours amount of buses and cars passed  by and I just sat there no strength in me to move I just stared at all the beautiful loving families enjoying their lovely time together appreciating one another for each of their own loving aspects until I was broken out my of thoughts by a woman who looks homeless but Who was I to judge we were in the same boat at this point,

"Are you going to stay here all night" she asked me,
"No I'm waiting on a bus" I lied,
"Don't pull that with me missy I've been sitting behind you for hours and every possible number buses have passed" she argued,
"Yes I'm going to stay here all night" I told her not finding the strength in me to argue right now,

"Come with me" she told me,

I gave here a skeptical look which she noticed,

"What's the worst that could happen to ya you're already homeless" she said to me shrugging and walking away expecting me to follow,

I had no choice no options what was the worst thing that could happen I was already homeless as she said so I followed her, dangerous I know but whatever. 

********

She took me to a homeless shelter and I was actually grateful I had somewhere to lay my head for the night..

As I lay my head on the hard mattress I wish I had someone to turn to even a boyfriend or someone who could comfort me in my time of need but unfortunately even boyfriends are unreliable,

*Flashback*

"I don't regret sleeping with her Alexis" said my so called boyfriend Ronald,
"how can you even say that to me"? I asked him crying,
"I just don't feel a connection with you anymore" he finished,

That was my so called boyfriend trying to explain why I caught him and my best friend Tia in bed having sex as much as I was broken and distressed I was so upset I slapped her I felt sorry afterwards not for her but because I lost my sanity and I stooped to her level.

I never saw those two again because my father died a little while after that and I just stayed away from everybody, I dropped out of college and I became a house mouse staying inside looking at the happy world outside the one I wish I could of been apart of until I was suddenly on the outside and it wasn't the beautiful outside I knew so well.

*end of flashback*

I curled up on the cold matrass trying to hold back tears but I couldn't my crying wasn't loud enough to wake anybody in the shelter but it was loud enough for me to realize I'm lost, I'm homeless and I have nothing and nobody.

I shouldn't be mad though because I was only born to save my sister she had a rare condition which made it hard for her to get the blood she needed for her to survive

Her sickness was called Fanconi Anemia and it cost my parents a lot of money to keep her alive so her doctors suggested my parents have  another child who could provide the blood she needed plus it would cost them way less and they could save their daughter that they loved so much.

I wouldn't have been mad if I was loved and also a blood bank baby but I was just always that and nothing more,

My father showed me love he showed me I wasn't only his savior baby but his daughter as well
but as for the rest of my family I was just the outcast and the hate increased once my father died.

I had enough of the abuse I gave my sister one of my kidneys because her being sick all the the time eventually damaged hers,

It was almost as if she should stay alive and I should just die for her to live,

I love my sister and I would have given her the world if it meant that it would save her but they didn't even try putting her on a transplant list they just went straight to telling me I had to, I wasn't even given a chance to choose if I wanted to,

My father loved us so much he could not watch his daughter suffer just for the other to stay alive so he committed suicide I guess he couldn't take the pressure anymore between choosing right or wrong, but losing him made me wish I would of given her everything she needed if it meant seeing the only person who ever loved me alive again,

But what my father did made me the outcast of the family but it made me want to live, it made me see that my father died for me to live and I wasn't going to endure any more abuse just to be loved or to fit in, my father loved me so much that he died for me so I was going to live and that made my mother mad she kicked me out along with the fact I didn't have a job so I couldn't help with the rent.

I may be the savior baby but I'm still human not a super hero and I will surely show them that.

But before I do that I have to cry myself to sleep just for tonight.

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