十七

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Taehyung? It's me, Irene. I thought long and hard about whether to call you, but it seemed unfair if I held this from you. God, i finally gather the courage to dial your number and you don't even answer! Anyway, call me back when you get the chance. it's kind of urgent.

This is the voicemail that Taehyung wakes up to. Irene's voice pours into his ear like wet ink smeared on paper, not quite coherent yet in his sleep-shrouded state. It doesn't even strike him that he'd gone back to bed after listening to the message without replying until he's out the door for his class at ML.

So he takes the time to redial Irene's number, pinning the phone between his shoulder and his ear as he struggles to open his car door and hold his belongings simultaneously. The phone rings three times before Irene answers.

"Morning," is the first thing she says to him. He gives a greeting in return, finally settling in his car. "Do you have time to talk right now?"

"Yeah." Thirty minutes till his session at the studio starts. "I have time."

"Okay. Then, um. How do I start."

"How?"

Irene sighs. "So she has these migraines. These horrible headaches that take over her at night and make her writhe in pain until her knuckles are ghostly pale and her face is beaded with sweat. And more recently, she began throwing up everything she ate. Taehyung, she can't even keep water down for more than an hour."

"Wait, are you talking about..."

"Freya."

Taehyung can feel the car sway, go in and out of focus as he takes in Irene's words. Images of Freya's migraine that one night flash in his mind, and everything becomes all too real.

"She doesn't want to tell you." Irene chuckles, but there's nothing sweet about it. "She's always been selfless, putting everyone before herself. But I'm not Freya. I had to tell you."

"Thank you, Irene." he chokes, voice cracking slightly. "I owe you big time."

————

Freya shows up at his flat later that day, bubbly and cheerful as if nothing was wrong with her at all. Taehyung must have stared at her too long, because she her lips curl downward in a frown.

"Tae? You okay?" she asks, big eyes growing even larger as she scans his features. Her hand presses warmly against his forearm, and Taehyung feels a lump form in his throat.

"You look really pretty today." he says, sigh-like.

"Thanks?" Freya chuckles, stepping inside. "I hope it isn't just today that you think I look pretty, though."

"You're always beautiful, Frey." Taehyung swallows that stupid lump in his throat. "Always have been, always will be."

She furrows her eyebrows at him. "You're acting weird today."

Taehyung can't even look her in the eye. "Are you okay?" he finally asks, and Freya stiffens just enough for him to notice.

"I'm fine. If you're still worried about the migraine I had the night you stayed over, don't worry. I haven't had one since." she smiles at him, and he wishes he could believe that her smile was genuine.

"Just tell me, please."

"Taehyung, really..."

Stupid, stupid fucking lump. Stupid stinging eyes. "You're not okay, are you? Irene tells me about your severe migraines and your inability to keep any solid food down for more than an hour, so don't tell me you're perfectly fine, Freya."

"I- I didn't want you to worry, okay? You've been through so much more pain than me, I couldn't bear to see you have to go through it again." she says, her own eyes brimming with tears. "I didn't want you to think that you killed me."

"So, what were you going to do? Just die on me?"

Freya swipes a tear from her cheek. "I was going to frame my death as an accident. I fell down the stairs, got hit by a train, I don't know."

"I never did kiss you, Freya." he says. "Why is this happening?"

"Time with touch. Ill fate's way of fucking with the two of us. We got close, held each other, touched each other. Maybe it builds up over time."

When Freya's fingers hold his, Taehyung grasps tight and never lets go. "Tell me it'll go away, Taehyung." she whispers, hiccups halting every other word.

He can't find it in him to respond. 

______

lol u thought freya was ok 

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