Even If You Don't // Calum Hood

Chapter 5: I'm Where I'm Meant to Be

Calum's POV

One month later, we were finally in Italy. Since the boys and I had never been to the country before, we were able to land a day off just to explore. But before that, we had two shows to play.

It was a typical morning: Early wake up calls for interviews, rushing back to the venue for soundcheck, and one...or four...pit stops at Starbucks along the way. The girls – much to the jealousy of my band – got to sleep in that morning and we made it back to the venue as they were getting ready to soundcheck.

Luke and Ashton went back to the hotel to take showers so Michael and I wouldn't have to wait for them to get done later. So he and I decided to go see if the girls needed help with anything on stage. We only found one of them – Mari – as she was setting up her drums, but Kaylynn came up behind us not long after. We didn't make our presences known, however – wanting to listen to Mari as she sang yet another Disney song to herself.

"All those days watching from the windows, all those years outside looking in, all that time never even knowing just how blind I'd been," Mari sang softly, "Now I'm here, blinking in the starlight. Now I'm here, suddenly, I see-" She paused her work to look out into the empty arena. "-standing here, it's all so clear I'm where I'm meant to be." She smiled slightly to herself, "And at last, I see the light and it's like the fog has lifted. And at last, I see the light, and it's like the sky is new. And it's warm and real and bright and the world has somehow shifted. All at once, everything looks different now that I see you."

"Cal, go," Kaylynn whispered.

"Kaylynn," I mumbled.

"Come on!" she exclaimed softly, "I know you know this song! She's always wanted to slow dance to this!"

"I have two left feet, Kay!" I shook my head, "If I go out there, I'm gonna make myself look like an idiot!" While Kaylynn huffed under her breath, Michael rolled his eyes and walked out onstage and I could feel my chest get heavier.

"All those days chasing down a daydream, all those years living in a blur-" Mari turned to look over her shoulder and found Michael smiling goofily as he sang Flynn's part. "-all that time never truly seeing things the way they were. Now she's here, shining in the starlight. Now she's here, suddenly, I know if she's here, it's crystal clear I'm where I'm meant to go." She giggled softly when he held his hand down to her, signaling for her to take it. He pulled her up to her feet, wrapping his other arm around her waist as her hand laid on his shoulder.

As the two of them sang the song and slow danced in the middle of the stage, Mari didn't even notice anyone else watching. When I saw her lay her head on Michael's shoulder, there was something happening in my chest I hadn't really ever felt before. It was like a twisting feeling mixed with a bit of anger. And it was my fault; Kaylynn had tried to get me to dance with her instead, but I refused, afraid I'd screw something up. But now, there was something there that I was more afraid.

What if me being too afraid to admit my feelings for Mari drove her to someone else? What if Michael decided that since I was too afraid to ask her out, he would instead? Deep down, I'd like to think that Michael would never do that to me, but as I walked away – not wanting to watch them anymore – I couldn't help but wonder what if.

No... Wait... What's wrong with me? I've known this girl for what, a month? I can't possibly have this much of a crush on her already... Right? And even if I did, I would have to get her alone long enough to admit that I liked her. But how am I supposed to do that with a schedule that made it so impossible?

~

Mari's POV

Michael and I finished singing the song, but neither of us moved away from each other. While we all hugged each other numerous times a day, it just felt nice to be able to do it for longer than two seconds without someone else interrupting.