Mine.

C9: Suicidal

Chapter 9

[Suicidal]
[Unedited- If you guys notice '(Y/N)' or some spelling errors, let me know, thank you]
AND THANK YOU FOR 500 FAVORITES ♥

Justin P.O.V

I couldn't just sit around and calm fucking down. I was worried about her condition in the bathroom. I could never imagine my life without her, my lord. I ran my hands through my hair and sighed heavily. That was all my fault. I couldn't help it. I was trying to fight myself but I failed, it as stronger than I was but it wasn't me. It wasn't me. It wasn't me. It wasn't...me. I didn't know how to control. I was too obsessed with her, she was just everything to me. She was mine and always mine. It wasn't bad if I had to make her mine, right? But still, how did it had to be like this?

'What if she hurts herself in the bathroom? What if she kills herself? What if she leaves me? What if she cut herself and leaves forever? What will happen to my life without her? I watched her for years. Now she's here, she's not going to leave me.'

I got up from the couch and quickly sprinted to the room. "Allie?" I called. I knocked the bathroom's door for maybe 100th time. "Allie, open the door; now." No response. "ALLIE, I SWEAR TO GOD I WILL KICK THIS DAMN DOOR GOD FORSAKEN IF YOU DON'T OPEN RIGHT NOW!" I hit the door with my bare hand and probably would leave a scar. I heard a flinch inside the bathroom, so I kicked the door forcefully. The door opened with an echoing slam, so loud in unusual silence. My eyes widened to see her position. Her body was covered in warmly red blanket and curled herself in the tub. Her hair was all messed up (but still looking pretty) as her hands were trembling, wondering if she had cut herself with a razor she gripped. She didn't look surprised by my sudden burst yet she was trying so bad to end her life. Without second thought, I grabbed her hand to stop her and snapped the razor. "What on earth are you doing?!" I raised my voice, "It's too fucking dangerous!" I gripped her hands tightly, ignoring the bruises that would form on her pale skin. She lowered her head as she burst into tears.

"Y-You took everything.. everything that was once mine. T-there's no me-meaning in my life.. not now, not ever, no more.." She sobbed louder. I slowly released her hands and caressed her cheeks. I rested my hand on her hair and stroked it as I hugged her and patted her back. "Shhhh, it's going to be alright. I promise, I'll do something that you will think your life is full of meaning. I'll show it to you, I swear." I kissed her forehead as she hugged back.

Unexpected reaction but I relieved that she calmed down.

Hay P.O.V

I shouldn't have showed him my weakness. I should have been stronger. Why did I hug my kidnapper who just raped me that night? Why did I cry helplessly in his arms? Why did I grip his shirt tightly? He raped me. He hurt me. He abused me. He placed me in dangerous, threatening and murderous situation. He promised me but he broke it. Maybe, he had killed my mother and burned my home so I didn't have a place that I could call home anymore. Yet, I was still in his arms. His warm hug made me calmed. His hands that was stroking my hair just like mom's. I felt safe. (Even in my kidnapper's arm)

'I will try to live here until I gain his trust and escape. Because, he did all this, against my will.'

skip~skip~skip~skip~skip~skip~skip~skip~skip~skip~skip~skip~skip~skip~skip~skip~skip~skip~skip~skip~skip~skip~skip

The next day, he gave me a little freedom, he said that I could freely walk in and out from the room. I could go to the kitchen, living room, game room, etc except; basement. But that wasn't enough for me to forgive him. I walked downstairs and stared at everyone. "Oh, (Hay, come and sit with us," Sheila smiled brightly as I walked to her and sat beside her. I brought my knees up and hugged them. "Are you okay?" She asked. "Yes," I lied without any hesitation and smiled. "Oh my God, I just detected a fake smile," Jake pretended that it was a big problem.

Everyone couldn't help but laugh to the little joke. "Oh, what's so funny here?" Gina asked, just walked out from the kitchen with 2 big box of popcorn in her both hands. "Nah, nothing" Jake said. "Gimme popcorn, gimme gimme!" Chad grinned as Gina handed him one. I sighed and stared at the TV's screen. Lost in stupid thoughts. "I know you're really not fine," Sheila whispered in my ears and embraced me with a hug as the tears started to form again around my eyes. "Hey, okay, don't cry, I beg you. I can't see a girl crying," Reed said. Gina came closer and sat beside me. "He's right. Here's a big box of popcorn and let's watch a movie," She smiled brightly and patted my back.

"Be strong," Gina whispered as I nodded. "So what movie?" Jack asked as he searched through the DVDs. Reed was playing game with his phone as Chad was eating the popcorn continuously. "Hey, don't eat all of it, you idiot!" Jack growled while he hit Chad's head jokingly. "Maybe a thrilling movie will do," Sheila said as she looked at me. "Indeed," I shrugged. "Then let's watch this movie," He said while pointing the DVD that he just found as we all nodded.

I heard the main door opened, we all turned our head to the door. It was Justin. Our eyes met but his eyes full of guilty. I looked down and turned my head to watch the movie, totally ignoring him. "Hey that's rude." I heard his voice behind me as I rolled my eyes. Whenever I thought about what happened in the morning, my cheeks flushed in red. He startled me when he hugged me from the back. I fake smiled and hit his chin with my head as he groaned. "What was that for?". "Intruding me while I'm busy watching a movie," I said as everyone held their laughs. He rolled his eyes, then he laughed as he messed up my hair. "M-My haiiirrr" I squealed as I stroke my hair back to normal. I glared at him as he smirked.

"Guys, we will go for that mission tomorrow as we planned.," He said as all of them nodded. "What plan?" I asked. He looked at me in hesitation. "Curiosity killed the cat, you know," I said again as he sighed. "Destroy Hunger Skull Gang," he said, "Neil's gang." "So what's your gang name?" I asked again. "We don't have name, actually." He smiled."And why is that?" I looked at everyone. "That's too childish." They laughed, "It's not like we're killing people for fun. They owe us shits so yeah," They laughed as I sighed. "Fine, fine." [I literally had forgotten a word; just added 'not' in the sentence bcs I have a bad fcking eyes ]

"Can I go with you?" I stared at him. "Don't make that cute puppy eyes, of course you are. I can never leave you alone in the house when I can't live without you even for 3 minutes." He said as he pinched my cheeks. "Yes." I grinned. At least, I could see the death of Neil, the wretch jerk. 'I can't wait to see it!'

-Cured