Chapter 9

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Chapter 9

I can still remember the hurt look on his face as I let him walk away. It seemed like he wanted me to ask him to stay, but I couldn't. He had to go. This was his job.

I will always be able to remember that moment.

Finally, I unclasped my legs from around his waist; however he didn't remove his hands from the tops of my thighs as he put me down. I didn't want him to let go. I needed to feel his touch. I remained close; our foreheads still resting together; our eyes still glued to one another's; our breath tangling together.

"Jonah," I heard my brother say from a distance, nervous to come too close. Jonah seemed to ignore him, but I saw a change in his eyes. I saw an overwhelming sadness and worry fill his forest green pools. I gulped as the lump - I thought I had swallowed - formed in the back of my throat. This was it.

"I promise I'll be here when you get back," I said trying to ease the vulnerability clear in his eyes.

"I love you so much," was his response. I felt my heart crack at the sound of his voice. I had never heard it so sad, so broken, and so completely helpless. It was if he had already given up. It seemed like he thought there was no chance of us surviving.

"Jonah," I mumbled, emotion racking my body, as I tilted his chin so he looked me in the eyes. "I will be here when you get back," I said confidently, trying to persuade him my words were true.

"I can't lose you," he muttered as his eyes left mine once again. He couldn't leave now. He couldn't leave with this doubt planted in his mind. If he left now, the doubt he was feeling now was going to grow into a full grown plant.

"You won't. I promise Jonah. I am not going anywhere. Please believe me. I love you so much," I said pronouncing each syllable as clearly as possible. I needed him to believe me. I needed him to know my words were true. I loved him.

His heart-breaking smile, which he only had for me, formed on his face and I felt everything wash away as I got lost in his smile. I loved him.

"I love you Jonah, remember that," were the next words that escaped my lips. He seemed tongue tied. He couldn't respond. I could see he had the words on the tip of his tongue but he just couldn't form them. I think it was because he knew when he said them he would have to leave and he didn't want to leave.

After a minute of silence, he gulped audibly, licked his lips and opened his mouth. He was going to say them. It was the end. He was about to leave. Tears poured down my cheeks. There were too many to control so I just let them fall onto my already wet t-shirt.

I was crying for Jamie. I was crying for Jonah. I was crying for their safety. I was crying for the love I felt for them. I was crying for fear. I was crying for them.

His hands moved up and cupped my damp cheeks. His eyes never left mine as he bent his knees so he was now the same height as me. "I love you so much," he whispered, his voice so broken it made even more tears leave my blood shot eyes.

Once the words left his lips he kissed me. It was unlike ever kiss I had ever experienced. It was so perfect I couldn't describe it. Then he wrapped his muscular arms around my small frame, pulling me into strong chest and surrounding me in his scent. I tried to remember everything I felt in that moment, the feeling of his body against mine, the feeling of my head against his cheek, the smell of his vanilla and lemon scent, and the way my heart was beating in my chest.

Without even saying a word he unravelled our tangled bodies and walked away. He grabbed his bag from Jamie's hand and walked into the crowded terminal. My eyes remained on him until he disappeared into the crowd. However, my gaze remained on the spot where I had last seen him. I let him walk away.

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