Bullies|| Noah schnapp x reader

Part 29

Noahs pov*

I can't believe millie would do that! Fuck I'm so mad

"Noah you really hurt y/n" Sadie says wiping her tears, I didn't hear what Sadie just said, I'm too angry at myself to listen to anyone else

"I didn't wanna keep going with this stupid little game millie was making me play" i said running my fingers through my hair

"Noah what the fuck!" Caleb said coming into the room, he saw Sadie crying and asked what was wrong, she just shook her head and looked down

"Noah, I knew you had a girl friend but Julia? Really?" He looked at me with a disapproving look "also millie announced it on her live. People are angry, they need Answers! And y/n is pretty upset she wouldn't even let me in."

"Y/n's upset?" I asked looking up

"Yeah no shit, you played her! I can't believe I didn't tell her." Caleb said shaking his head

"She's gonna hate us when she finds out we knew about it and didn't tell her" Sadie said wiping her nose

"I'm gonna go look for her" I said storming out of my room, they didn't follow me fortunately

I went to her room and knocked on it a couple of times, I didn't wanna revel it was me so I covered the hole thing

Someone opened the door and it wasn't y/n

"Finn?" I asked "what are you doing here?"

"Sorry bro, I had to tell her. I was tired of these games millie was making you play. She needs to know" he said walking out of the room

"She's mad" I say "it's too late already, millie announced it" I say and finn leaves looking destroyed I got to grab the door before it closed and I walked in

"Y/n" I say softly, she was sitting on her bed crying

I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. Look at y/n because of my stupid actions

"What do you want?" She asked harshly

"Y/n I'm sorry" I said feeling really guilty and upset

"I'm sorry? I'm sorry too. I'm sorry I trusted you" I could tell y/n wanted to say more, but at the moment that's all she could say. They were small words but they crushed me.

"I know finn told you why I did it. I shouldn't have agreed-" I was saying trying to explain myself but she cut me off

"Yeah, you shouldn't have. What you did was selfish. You had a choice before you say you didnt. Sometimes the choice is the hard one, the one that ends up hurting you more than others. That's sometimes the better choice, but I can understand" y/n said in a low voice, barley hearable. I could tell she was fighting back tears. She hasn't looked at me this whole time

"I know.. I realized too late it was selfish. I was stupid, I played you, I ended up cheating on my girlfriend. This whole time I thought I was protecting her.." I swallow back a lump in my throat

Julia didn't wanna tell anyone about our relationship, she wanted to keep it secret just so we could keep it to ourselves be happy in our relationship without any bothers. But I was dumb enough to trust my so called bestfriend

"Yeah you did, now get out" y/n harshly said

"But, y/n I'm really really sorry, I know that doesn't cut it but" I stopped as I saw y/n standing up and walking closer to me, still not looking at me but at my feet

"I thought I could trust you! My stupid mistake" she chuckled a sad chuckle "I was really starting to fall for you..." she stopped and fought back tears "you're nothing but a liar! A disgusting selfish liar! Get out of my face, once I'm done filming I don't wanna hear from you ever again. Now leave!!" She screamed, tears were now forming in my eyes and I saw nothing but a blur now

"Y/n please" I begged "at least look me in the eye and tell me that" I didn't wanna believe it as true

She refused to look at me, but I kept begging until she finally gave in

I saw her eyes on mine, I felt the pain she was feeling I saw the sorrow, trust loss, anger, everything but most importantly heart break

"Leave!" She screamed her voice cracking a bit "I don't ever wanna..." she looked away and screamed at me to go. I finally decided to leave

"Y/n I'm sorry, I really am. I know you'll never forgive me but please don't hurt yourself" I felt one last tear trickle down my cheek and saw that y/n had the same. Which for some reason broke my heart even more

*smol trigger warning*

I left the room and held the door slightly open for a few minutes contemplating going back in and trying to make it better with her. I felt a rush of emotion in me and i got a bad feeling, I opened to door again to find y/n gone. Her phone was on the floor and it was opened to a picture of us together.

I rushed to the bathroom and opened it just in time

"Y/n! What are you doing!!? Stop!" I grabbed her hand and the blade ended up cutting my hand a bit but I didn't care, I knocked the thing out of hers and picked her up

"What are you doing? Let go you stupid piece of shit! Let go!" She cried out loudly "you're nothing but a piece of shit who stole my heart and stomped on it" she cried getting quieter she gasped for air and I held onto her tightly

"I just wanna die now, the only one who made me happy was you! And now you're the one who makes me wanna die!" She cried quietly, I held onto her tightly not wanting to let go

I looked around her arms and noticed two new big cuts, not deep but big. I grabbed her arm and felt tears running down my face

"Y/n this doesn't help" I say holding her

"Yes it does" she cried "let me go!" She was getting quieter

This chapter is long bad and it made no sense, I'm sorry. Also I'm gonna be uploading late or less because school starts tomorrow and I wanna fucking die now BUT it's fine

Uh but yeah