my (parent's) dream man

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I know what I said about Dean and not seeing him again, but yeah, we went out together the other night, we went to the cinema and I let him give me one of those disgusting love bites on my neck, so now I look like a chav too

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I know what I said about Dean and not seeing him again, but yeah, we went out together the other night, we went to the cinema and I let him give me one of those disgusting love bites on my neck, so now I look like a chav too.

After he'd been arrested I took his keys home with me for safe keeping, he finally messaged me and then when he turned up on my doorstep to retrieve them, my mum had answered, invited him in, and the rest, as they say, is history.

My mum is practically all over him whenever he comes round our house, honestly, I think she kind of fancies him or something. She's always got a reason to touch his bicep and say, "ooh, aren't you a strapping young lad," in this weird voice that I've never really heard her use before. And I've lost count of the number of times she's asked him to show her how to use her treadmill, despite the fact that she's had it three years.

Ugh, and my dad's just as bad, he always wants to have a quick five-minute chat with him which always takes longer than five minutes; it's gets right on my nerves. "He's a right clever one that Dean," he says, like all the time.

If either of them knew that he'd acquired his muscles and education in prison they'd both have a heart attack. I'm surprised that they don't already know, given the fact that the twerp Sam knows all about Dean and his colourful history — I mean they were in the same year at school, well, before Dean got expelled that is. I could just tell from the look on Sam's face when Dean first came to the house that he was pretty disgusted with me. He's hardly spoken a word to me since, so I guess it's true what they say about every cloud having a silver lining.

Steph has been acting like a dick about the whole thing as well, "I can't believe you're going out with him again, after what happened," she said.

But why shouldn't I?

"You'll never settle down with a guy like that," she told me over a bottle of prosecco.

She couldn't quite get it into her head that I wasn't looking for someone to settle down with. It wasn't as if I was looking for a husband, and I certainly didn't want babies; it was Steph's job to provide the grandchildren.

And anyway, if she read as many magazines as I did, she would know that every girl likes a bad boy, and if you believed the stories, then I suppose that Dean would fit in that category. Apparently, he'd first been arrested when he was thirteen, excluded from school the following year and then gone to a young offenders institute six months after that. He said that he couldn't even remember how many times he'd been arrested, but his criminal record was extensive, and he'd spent more than a few nights in prison. But I didn't care about any of that, Dean was nice to me, and that was all I wanted.

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