Peter & Bucky Are Pals

Chapter 43

The next morning, Peter made his way into the kitchen to find Clint flipping pancakes, wearing purple boxers and a shirt with ‘Peter thinks I’m the coolest’ written hastily on it with sharpie.

“Morning!” Clint said cheerfully. “I like your hair! JARVIS said that the whole purple thing was a coincidence, but I’m choosing not to believe that.”

Peter grinned, taking a seat at the table. Clint slid a plate of syrup-drenched blueberry pancakes in front of him, then returned to his place by the stove.

“Thanks!” said Peter, carving himself a bite and digging in.

“I chose blueberries ‘cause they go with the purple mood,” Clint informed him. “It’s too bad they don’t make purple syrup.”

Peter swallowed his mouthful of pancake, then said, “It would just take food coloring, right? You could probably make the pancakes purple, too.”

Clint flailed a little and nearly burned himself on the pan. “Holy shit, you’re a genius! JARVIS, do we have food coloring?”

“I believe the food coloring is at the back of the spice cabinet,” JARVIS replied. “Although I caution you against attempting the experiment now. You need to leave in ten minutes to bring Mr. Parker to school.”

Clint waved his spatula in dismissal. “It’s fine. Worst happens, I can call him in late, right? I’ll say we got stuck in traffic.”

“Seeing as Mr. Parker walks to school every day, I don’t believe that’s a viable excuse,” JARVIS said dryly.

“Challenge accepted,” Clint replied with a grin. “I’m the master of thinking of viable excuses. Let’s see… He has a dentist’s appointment.”

“Mr. Parker’s dentist’s office doesn’t open until 8:30 AM,” JARVIS informed him.

“Doctor’s appointment?” he tried.

“Mr. Parker has already had his annual physical,” said JARVIS.

Clint frowned. “Therapy?”

“Mr. Parker’s counseling appointments are scheduled regularly after school hours,” JARVIS replied promptly.

Clint made a faint sound of frustration before his eyes brightened. “Oh, oh, what’s it called… Cairo-practicer!”

“Mr. Parker has no present need to see a chiropractor,” JARVIS said.

“Yeah, but the school doesn’t know that!” said Clint gleefully. “Suck it, I win!”

JARVIS didn’t disagree, but Peter was pretty sure he was just tired of arguing with an overly determined Clint.

“Alright, let’s see, what’s the phone number…” Clint scrolled through his phone, tongue poking out of the corner of his mouth as he simultaneously kept an eye on the pancakes. “Here we go, it’s ringing! Hang on, lemme put on my grown-up voice. Ahem. I’m a responsible adult. I do adult-y things like paying taxes and shit. I’m- Oh, hello, Ma’am! This is… Clint Potts, I’m Peter Parker’s uncle. I just wanted to let you know that Peter has a… a…”

Clint gave Peter a panicked look and mouthed, “How do you say it?”

“Chiropractor,” Peter whispered.