Our Little Secret (Kylo Ren x Reader)

He Felt Like Home

You didn't hear a word that the instructor was saying for the entire meeting. You were too distracted by the boy sitting across from you--never once letting go of your gaze. You didn't know what to think, feel--anything. The shock of seeing him overtook you, paralyzing your body and mind. Everything just went blank. 

Quill. You knew him--or you'd known him. You'd thought he was dead, just like the rest of them. You thought you were the only one that had survived, but there he was, sitting across from you. He'd probably thought the same, judging by the shocked expression on his face. He looked you up and down from across the table, his green eyes bringing back memories you hadn't thought of in a long time. You'd been friends back at the base. Good friends. He knew you like you knew yourself. There wasn't a day that went by that you hadn't spoken to him. He'd been with you ever since you could remember. A specific memory bubbled to your mind as you stared at him, shock clouding your vision. 

You two were back at the base, leaning up against a ship that he'd agreed to help you fix. He was no engineer, but you thought it was sweet that he'd wanted to help. 

"I saw you walking with Leia yesterday," he'd said, tucking his dark hair behind his ear, "You looked upset. Is everything okay?" It was the day you'd talked to Leia about your parents. The day that she'd told you about Ben.

"Yeah," you lied, faking a smile, "I was just stressed." He narrowed his eyes at you, a doubting look on his face.

"Y/N, come on." He prodded, "I know you. What's going on?" You sighed, drooping your head.

"Do you ever feel--I don't know--lost?"

"Yeah," he scoffed, "all the time."

"I mean, like, you don't have a real place that you can call home?"

"This is my home," He said with confidence, "And it's yours too." You smiled weakly, fiddling with your shirt sleeve. Suddenly, he reached over and took your hands in his, turning you towards him and forcing you to meet his gaze. 

"This is your home. Here, with me."

You felt your heart leap as he spoke, your cheeks burning. Whether you would admit it or not, you'd always felt something for Quill. Something more than just friendship. And now, with his face just inches from yours, the feeling was stronger than ever. 

"I know." You whispered, a soft smile creeping across your lips.

You were too lost in your own thoughts to hear when the instructor dismissed you. Her words didn't even register in your ears. You only realized what was happening when everyone around you started to stand and exit the room. Quill, who was still staring intensely at you, didn't notice at first either. Your eye contact finally broke as you shook your head, standing up out of the chair. You met his gaze again as you sped around the table, rushing towards him. You started to cry before you even reached his arms, crashing into him as he wrapped around you in a crushing embrace. He pulled you tight against him, nestling his face in your hair. You rested your face against his shoulder, sobbing into his jacket.

"Oh my god," he breathed, rocking you side to side, "Oh my god."

"I know-" you choked, smiling wider than you ever had. In his arms, you finally felt safe for the first time in weeks. You felt yourself relax against him, all of the stress and pain melting away. He felt like home, and you never wanted to let him go. He stepped back, resting his hands on your shoulders. He stared at you, his mouth hanging open.

"How-" he started, tears welling in his eyes, "How did you--how are you alive? How is the happening right now?"

"I don't know," you cried, laughing through your tears, "How are you alive!?" He snickered, shaking his head.