22| Loving You Was As Right As Rain

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I was doing exactly what I promised myself I wouldn't do years ago

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I was doing exactly what I promised myself I wouldn't do years ago. I was worrying, thinking out every move I was going to make. I thought when I moved to New York and started to live for myself that I would be able to let loose, stop trying to control what I could not control.

His truck wasn't in the driveway when I pulled up to the house. I sat in the car, my legs fighting against me, trying to tell me that sitting here was the best course of action. I felt like a teenager again, too nervous to talk to the person they liked. This was just typical me.

I stepped out of the car, I would at least ring the doorbell and make sure he wasn't home, that way I could tell myself that I had tried. That maybe this just wasn't meant to be, that I was better off alone with just Mabel and I.

I waited and listened as the bell rang through the house. I hadn't noticed the first time I had come over but Keaton's house had changed significantly. The grass was greener and shorter than it once had been which only made the newly renovated porch and siding of the house. Keaton had really put effort into the renovation of the beaten down house.

A creak sounded towards the left, I turned around, shielding my eyes from the sun that beamed down in that direction. "He's not here." A warm voice said from a porch a door down from where I stood.

I squinted, my hands weren't too well of a job. "You missed him again."

I looked on in shock. The same woman from three years ago still lived next door. Albeit, her hair had greyed further and her movements seemed much slower. She had to be around fifty-six years old now. Her smile was still kind and patient. Although she was recognizable, I wasn't sure what she meant by again.

"I remember you," she says, setting the garbage bag down at her feet. "Beatrice?" She asked thoughtfully.

"Yes, that's me, ma'am," I answer with my best smile even though my stomach was flopping around nervously.

"I'd remember that face anywhere," she answered, picking up the. Af once again and walking down the porch steps in the direction of her garbage can. I follow suit and make my way to the centre of the grass separating the houses. "You were dating Morgan's boy." She nodded towards the house.

"You said I missed him?" I asked, hoping to sway the conversation away from the past.

"He left about an hour ago," she thought back and her face brightened up, "I think he was packing boxes into his truck?"

My face dropped, he was moving again. I knew this wasn't going to work out. I can't believe I embarrassed myself like this again.

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