Book Reviews [closed]

Bad Girls Nerd, By Angry_human_

Review for _angry_human_ !

Description
I could tell the description of the story was meant to be playful  and funny, and it was like a romance-comedy. But reading it more and more became more and more boring to read. The story was like the same thing on repeat because you kept throwing in jokes, and it soon became flat. Entertain the readers with something unpredictable and new every chapter. The end of every chapter should have readers wanting to read more, and should have them wonder what might happen next. Everything was going so slow in the story so it became boring. Description wise, the description of things weren't the best. It felt like the only times you'd really get into describing something was if you were talking about a character. Balance it out with an equal amount of descriptions for equally important things in the story. Don't only describe the characters, but the setting, the movements, and the objects.

Grammar/Spelling
Overall the story didn't contain many spelling errors. The grammar and the wording on the other hand was much worse.

I saw that you did this one particular thing a lot. You'd insert small little snippets of sentences, then to follow them up, you'd decide to insert long paragraphs describing her relationship with another character, or describing her background life. If you want the readers to know things like this then add them beforehand. Don't stop the storyline every 5 seconds to explain why Natalia is the way she is, or what happened back then in her early life like in the two examples below.

Also, don't use "IDK," "JK," and "PS" and acronyms like those if it's in the description of the story and if it's not a text from a character or something. I saw you using it like four times throughout only like the first couple of chapters.

Characters
There wasn't anything special or good to say about the characters to be honest. The main characters Natalia and Luke were all bold and confident, which isn't necessarily a bad thing- of course the main characters can be confident if you'd 
like them to be. The thing is though, when you first introduced Natalia to Luke, he wrote a whole essay in his mind on how hot he thought she was. That made is so obvious that he'd later on fall for her. It was like Luke had nothing to him other than his whole bad boy act, and that he was popular, smart and hot and he also occasionally wore glasses. Sometimes it felt as if the characters were really bland and fake, and it felt like they weren't realistic at all.

The other side characters were fine, nothing good but nothing bad to them. Though I'd like to say that it was questionable how most of the characters thought just because someone had glasses they identified as nerds. That was stereotypical, and so was most of the story/ characters. Parts like this formed it to be cliche and kind of cringeworthy.

Plot
Sarcasm and jokes are totally fine but remember to put a limit on it. I only saw it like a few times in your story, but remember to not use too many comedic/funny scenes to use as filler chapters, because if you continue to do this then the plot will get absolutely nowhere. As for the actual plot you should add some more things to it. After reading, there was never any tension between the characters, and there weren't any rising actions or big changes. Add more gripping details to it and jaw dropping scenes.

Dialogue
Ill give you credit for some of the dialogue. It was unique and it had this nice flair to it. The choice of language and the humorous words pulled the dialogue together, making it realistically funny. But some of the dialogue was robotic and inhuman like. Like the example below, don't turn the dialogue into something unreadable. The characters should have expression and feelings, so don't make them sound like robots with no emotions.

Turn this:

Into this:
"Nana, are you awake?" I ask, my voice quiet.

"Oh hey Lia, I was just about to go to bed. I've been pretty tired lately," she responds.

"Did you eat yet then?"

"Yes hun, and I also took my medicine. Now go on and let me rest," Nana says.

I snicker. "Goodnight Nana," I whisper. And with that, I shut the door softly.

Pros:
-Dialogue

Cons:
-Characters
-Plot
-Description