You Flaming Idiot, I Love You!

3

Gray

I yelp when he crashes into me headfirst, forcing the doors to fly open and for my back to scrape against the concrete. As the ground claws into my skin, he beckons with his hand, already recovered. "Bring it on, you demented exhibitionist!"
Shit, it hurts! "Fine, you annoying little brat!"

I spring up with a roundhouse kick, but he manages to parry with crossed arms. Before I can react, he retaliates with a crushing blow to the face.
"Ow! You'll pay for that, you..!"
We throw as many jabs at each other as we can, shouting threats and not giving a damn about anything but getting that win. Until he stops, expression turning pale.

I hold my punch, blinking without a clue. But then, I notice it: the darkness rising from behind.
My life flashes before my eyes when I turn around...
And meet Erza's glare of death.

Name of the father, the son, and the holy Mavis. Before I can get any farther with my recitation, she grabs us by our necks and smashes our heads together. I start to see glimpses of the afterlife as Natsu and I lay on the floor.

"Stop fighting, you two! You've made too much chaos while I've been trying to enjoy my cake!" Not her cake...
"Sorry, Erza..."
Natsu staggers to his feet, teetering around as he tries to regain consciousness. Erza shakes her head at the sight of our pathetic suffering.
But after this is when she decides to make the final blow that will make Natsu and I regret every single second we just spent at each other's throats.
"As punishment, you two will be sent on a mission together!"

Cue it: the black-and-white, the slow motion, the sad piano. My gaze, slowly but surely, moves to Natsu. It's in this moment that we must cherish our final moments.

"Here is the flier." She holds out a piece of paper. We stare at it.
"Take it, or else you'll have to fight me!" She threatens, her metal clads splitting the ground as she rattles the flier our way. Natsu quickly grabs it from her, the poor guy looking like he's about to cry.
I hear myself say, "We have to do it now?"
"Yes. It's just a little one. You guys can do it easily, right?"

She asks again after another breath of silence, "Right?!"
"Yes, Erza..." Natsu and I drone back. The air's become thick and heavy.
"Ugh, why..." He drifts, his cheek smushed up against the nearest table.
"Come on, you weak-willed pinkie head," I say. I'm trying to keep it together, but alarms in my head are going off everywhere. He slouches up from where he's resting, not even bothering to refute.
I drag my feet out the building, questioning my existence. He follows suit.

Natsu

There's one thing I know for sure:
This is gonna be a total disaster.

"What do we needa do?" I say. I keep my nose under my scarf as we stand outside.
"Here." He tears off an envelope from the flier, rips it open. I spot a note with a ticket attached inside.
"What does it say?" 

He clears his throat. "Go to the destination marked on the map, and there you will find a house with the number that matches your ticket. That will be where you two are staying. Once you arrive, leave the ticket tucked under the floor mat. Survive together for the day. If you do not follow the job's directions, be prepared for a punishment from your dear friends, Erza and Mirajane. Good luck. From Lucy..."

"Where's the reward?" 
"It didn't say anything about a reward," he says, looking up at me.
We stare at each other for a while.

"Look," he says moments later, already ahead. His eyes have lost their light. "Let's try to get along just for today. Otherwise, I'm going to die." 
"Hello?! I'm the one who's gonna die!" I cry from behind. He turns back, shooting me a look.
"You're the one. Really?"
"Yeah, I'm allergic to you! You know that, right?"
He scoffs. "Allergic, my ass. You're the one who's gonna drive me insane!"
The hand gestures are only becoming wilder by the second. "We haven't even gotten that far away from the guild. Do you know how screwed we are?"
"You don't need to ask. We're doomed."
"Yeah."