Anthesia

106 "I will be fine, just not yet"

Is it true? I was witnessing every single fear of mine turning into reality and as I gulped in my tears, I went kneeling down next to the body. How am I supposed to take this all in? I wanted to rewind time if that was even possible but I know I can't ever take back or change anything that had just happened. On the spur of that moment I felt like some one ate my heart out.

Chief Arthur arrested the intruder as he made his walk of shame. The crowd's screaming dispelled bit by bit till I was left with only and only my pain. I was holding on by just a hair's breadth from sinking into my own misery. The worst part was that I knew exactly who was to blame for this.

I sat there drowning in my own tears as an hour passed and then another. The old women of the town slowly got the netted white cloth and one started covering the body. I wiped my tears knowing that as a king, I had to withhold my emotions in place. As the cloth began to gracefully cover the face, I held on to the woman's wrinkled arm stopping her and spoke,

"I want to see my mother one last time" and sheobliged.

I was seeing her but not her anymore. Everytime I went into her room as a kid, she would point out the wounds in my arms from the sword trainings we used to have but today she left me with the biggest wound of all and I have to live with it for the rest of my life.

As the cloth went over her face, chief Arthur tapped on to my shoulder.

"As the elder child, you need to do the rituals", he said.

I looked at him as tears slowly rolled down my cheeks.

"Of course", I replied.

The rituals were read to me as I got up from my sore knees.

"The King would have to bear the body by his arms up the stairs of death till they reach the end", spoke the old woman.

There were seven steps that led to nothing in the middle of the forest where the sun rays were falling only on the top most step. Even though it is said to be seven steps, it feels like the steps just keep going, I guess that's one of such illusions of Anthesia. I didn't quite understand the need for these steps in the first place, but I knew that I had to obey the rituals in order to send the one person I loved in peace.

"What must be done when I step foot onto the last one?" I questioned curiously. Everyone looked at each other with a jumbled face and wondered how they would reply to that.

"You will know, King", Chief Arthur replied as he looked at me. His eyes screamed pain; he lost his someone he called a sister too that day. I lifted mother onto my arms as the cloth was wrapped across her now-turned cold body.

"Allow me to-", Chief Arthur stretched his arms to help me carry the pale-blue body.

"-I can", I replied. I made my way to the top, step by step. As I went higher, a flash of light covered my vision and suddenly memories of me and mother started flashing in front of my eyes. It is said that the memories that we see when we go up the stairs are the ones we want the dead to take with them.

They roiled back in one by one and that was when it started to hit me- I would never be able to sneak out with mother to go near the Seazen Deck and eat dry fruits when I wasn't allowed to or how much we would struggle to bathe Veon together. Some parts of me knew that the reason these memories were flashing in front of my eyes was because we can no longer make such memories. I couldn't hold my tears in and holding them in was the least of my concerns. As I moved higher up the stairs my hands started to feel lighter. I opened my eyes soon enough with fear taking over my body and saw a huge beam of light on my mother as she was glowing. She was being taken to heaven I suppose.