Everything in Between

Chapter 23

September 2020

Seven days after I moved to Ann Arbor to start graduate school, Cece drove from Detroit to Ann Arbor to visit me for the weekend. We finished a yoga class and went for lunch at a local restaurant. I'm so happy to have Cece here for the weekend before my studies take over my entire life and my focus becomes my education. Having her here is a breath of fresh air, especially after everything that happened between me and Zach.

I was aware that having crossed that line with Zach should've changed everything, but it hadn't. We continued to act as though things were status quo and sex somehow changed nothing. Maybe it was the distance. Maybe it was our rock solid friendship. Or maybe it was an unspoken mutual understanding that it was a one-time thing. 

We've been in constant contact since he left for Europe. We text back and forth daily; he sends me updates on his adventures and photos of his travels. We Facetime whenever we can make the time difference work. The fun and the flirty air between us has become slightly heightened. It feels awkward knowing we've ignored the last time we were physically together or the avoidance of how we slept together - but there was no point in discussing it when he was so far away. Even though I missed Zach, having him halfway across the world right now was safer.

When we sit down at a table in the far right corner of the restaurant, Cece's face tells me she's beyond thrilled to be here for the entire weekend.

"I'm so happy you are back in Michigan," she says as I sit across from her. "I've missed you so much."

I laugh, grabbing the water in front of me. "I'm happy to be back, too."

"We can spend every weekend together now. You can drive to Detroit and stay at our place. Or I can drive to Ann Arbor to see you. Me, you and Bridget can have girls' nights and brunches and -"

The server appears in front of us, smiling. "Hi, ladies. Can I get you something to drink?"

I feel Cece's inspection as she looks down at the menu.

"An espresso martini for me," she finally says.

I glance up at the server. "Same for me, please."

She nods with a smile and disappears behind the bar. 

"Anyway," she continues without a beat. "I'm just so happy you decided to complete your Masters here and not somewhere far away. Because we both know you're destined for great things and probably won't end up sticking around the Midwest once you've officially graduated." I don't look at her face after she says this because I'm not sure how I'll feel if her expression matches the melancholy edge of her words. I'm nervous about leaving my mom, friends and the Midwest behind once I've graduated, but I know I must pursue my career.

"How's your mom been?" she asks, changing the subject.

I glance up from the menu. "She's good. You know, the same old. She's been enjoying gardening and chardonnay."

Cece laughs at this.

"She hasn't been feeling the greatest lately, though, which is a little concerning to me." I feel like I'm going to break down in tears. Ever since her cancer scare, I've become hypervigilant about my mom's health. Even when the slightest cough escapes her lips, or she sneezes one too many times in a row, I'm on edge. Cece places her hand on mine. This eases my anxiety. "She says it's just exhaustion from starting a new school year, but who knows? I wish she would retire already and stop taking care of everyone else but herself. Thankfully, she has her mandatory follow-up appointment with her oncologist soon, so hopefully, it's nothing."

Cece smiles at me. "She does teach elementary school kids," she pauses, and I can't help but smile. She's doing her best to cheer me up. "Could you imagine spending every day with a bunch of little buggers? You'd be exhausted, too."