Light of my Life

11. The Past is Haunting

A/N: this chapter has a little violence kind of situation in Star's POV. It's not detailed much but still it might trigger some people. It has mentions of panic attack and a slight description of it. So read with caution pls

Nina's POV:

Entering the school doors after the break, there's no much change. The break passed by way to soon and I hate it. Thankfully I've completed my homeworks as much as possible. I saw Star standing by her locker talking with her friends. I sent a quick smile and wave before heading to my locker. Soon the bell rung and we rushed to our classes.

Classes were boring as usual. Soon lunch rolled over and I found Star sitting outside so I joined her. "Hey" I said sitting beside her. "Oh hey Nina" she said smiling. "How are you doing? Better?" "I'm fine. You?" She asked, shrugging her shoulders. "Fine. Hate classes though" I said chuckling a little. She just shook her head. Soon we were talking about how her meet up went and random stuff. She had heard from someone about my past relationship and so I told her about when and who.

Thankfully she didn't anything else other than why we broke up. It's not something I want to talk about. I mean who does anyway. She's understanding and doesn't ask much questions which I'm grateful for. The bell rung and we parted ways.

Star's POV:

The day went fine. I spent the classes doodling or sleeping without the teacher noticing. It's a talent of mine. I'm getting more tired as days pass by though I sleep at night for at least 6 hours. Talking with Nina made my day better. Like literally I felt better than how I felt this morning.

School ended an hour ago and I'm walking around my block aimlessly. As I passed the street our old house was I saw someone standing with a bicycle. It was very familiar and I had a sudden wave of déjà vu. It was him. Even from such distance I could recognise him. My breathing became quicker as I started walking away fast and soon I was running back towards my house. I entered my house and locked the door before running up the stairs and crashing on my bed. I was breathing heavily, sweat covering my forehead and palms. Shutting my eyes close I tried to focus on breathing. It took me while before I calmed from the almost panic attack.

I can't believe he's still around. It's been years and he had to be back around at this time. Thankfully he hadn't noticed me, not that he'd have recognised me quickly. I sighed and locked all the doors and windows because I'm a very paranoid person and being safe is better than sorry. I put on Netflix to distract myself. It helped until I fell asleep.

I was running as fast as I can. I was 7 years old again. He was just behind me, catching up with me. I felt weak. So weak I couldn't have myself running any faster. He quickly grabbed me into a nearby alleyway. It was dark and lonely. Perfect enough for him. I tried to pry him arms away. 45 lbs Vs 165 lbs. My arms felt sluggish and heavy. I couldn't move them much. He had me pressed forcefully against the wall with him one arm pining both of mine above my head and the other covering my mouth from making noise. I was squirming under him. Fear taking the best of me. Panic rising inside me. He was about to close the very little distance...

I suddenly woke up with my body covered in sweat, shaking and tears streaming down my cheeks. I broke down to full on sobbing, covering myself with the blanket and looking around to make sure it wasn't true. It didn't help. My throat felt like it was closing in while I was shaking vigorously on my bed. Forcing myself to take deep breaths to recover from panic attacks, I did as I had read from the articles.

Still breathing heavily and crying I reached over my phone to look at the time. 3:26 am it read. Too early to wake up but I can't go back to sleep again. I contemplated texting someone but didn't bother to do it. Instead I just laid back on my bed, curling into a ball and crying until I passed out.

I woke up feeling terrible. The effects of the nightmare still intact. But I'm good at acting like everything is fine so I did my morning routine and went to school not bothering to eat anything since I'd lost any appetite. The day went as a blur. I didn't talk much to anyone. Just joking a few times during class. I was too tired. Not able to eat anything I skipped lunch and slept away in the library. I managed not to zone out too much and pretend like nothing happened. No questions so far. I haven't seen Nina yet and that's a good thing because she'd be able to read me better and I don't want that. The next few weeks went fine. No nightmares again. No sight of him. It went smooth other than the everyday late night fights my parents have.

A few weeks later...
The Halloween dance at school had been held to which I didn't go. I bailed on it to go out with my uncle and my family except my father who was busy. No surprise there.

My friendship with Nina and others at school is going good though I already have a few friends ghosting on me. Nothing new. November rolled in and was out quicker than I thought. I've been doing terribly at the classes. Failing physics and maths the most important subjects. Focusing on the basketball games has kept me from going crazy. At least there's one thing I'm still good enough at.

A/N: just a filler chapter. It's shitty and super short ik, sorry. See you guys soon. Take care and be safe please!! :)