BLOOM • awsten knight

77

APRIL 2019

"Holy shit, Elle!" Jawn grins, as they spot her heading towards the backstage room. "I know I haven't seen you play in a while, but that was fucking incredible!"

"Thank you," she giggles, accepting his hug, gladly.

Taylor greets Jawn now, too; she introduces him to Ethan, and Awsten recognises his name as he overhears it, realising who he is now. Taylor opens the door for Jawn to head into the room with them.

Awsten is stood awkwardly behind Jawn once again, with his sleeves pulled down over his hands, gripping the fabric tightly.

Elle waits behind, and her eyes meet Awsten's when he finally looks up.

There's a thick silence for a long moment, both of their gazes flickering between the ground and each other.

"That was-" Awsten begins, but his voice is too shaky, so he pauses, attempting to clear his throat. "You were really amazing out there."

"Thank you," Elle nods, slowly. "I don't think I actually expected you to show up," she admits.

Her words sting in a strange way, but Awsten is glad she's being honest, at least.

"Yeah, I, uhm," he pauses again, frowning, in attempts to find the right words. "I haven't been around a lot."

It's silent for another long moment, and the corridor suddenly feels freezing cold.

"Awsten," Elle speaks up, and an odd sensation runs through his chest as he hears her saying his name. His name feels strange to Elle as it leaves her lips, though, as he looks up with a longing gaze, that almost makes her heart stop. "Why are you here?"

He takes a deep breath, looking around him briefly, trying to find the right words to say. "I don't know," he mumbles, his gaze falling to the floor.

Elle sighs quietly, looking away from him, as her shoulders slump.

The change in her demeanour causes Awsten to look up again.

"Are you angry?" He questions, cautiously.

Elle waits a moment. "No," she answers, hoping her voice comes out as steady as she intends it to, as her jaw clenches slightly.

"Okay, so you're a little angry," Awsten observes, noticing the hesitation in her voice, and Elle head snaps back to face him. "What?" He asks, gently, his eyes glued on her expression, as she looks taken aback.

She soon deflates again, though, shuffling her feet uncomfortably.

"I hate that-" Elle starts, with a harsh tone, before taking a breath to compose herself. "I don't get how you can still do that."

"Do what?" Awsten presses, carefully.

"I hate that you just know," she replies, looking back at him again. "You always just knew."

"I don't think I knew enough," he responds, with a soft and guilty tone.

Elle's lip quivers slightly at his words, but she tries to hold back any sort of reaction - tries and fails - while she stays quiet.

"Was that about me?" Awsten breaks the silence again. "That song?"

"Stay?" Elle queries, earning a nod. "Yeah, it's about you," she answers. "So is Less Than I Do," she adds. "And Something To Hold Onto, but I don't know if you've-"

"I heard that one, too," he confirms. "Into You?"

"Yeah.." Elle replies, slowly. "That was- I wrote that a while ago."