The Smirking Jerk (Blake's POV)

Chapter 29

Chapter 29

"Wanna talk about it?" Fred suddenly said.

I looked up, and frowned. "Talk about what?"

"The reason why you decided to drive over here at like midnight, to order food you're not eating, begging me to take a break to talk with you while you're not actually talking."

I was feeling a little weird after my session at the therapist. I had to give it to my mom for not pressing me too much into telling her what we had talked about in detail. I'd sort of glossed over the main themes, but it just felt weird to talk about it again.

I hadn't been able to sleep. My first instinct had been to drive up to Josh's place, but I was sure he knew about the therapy thing. And I didn't want him to press for questions either.

So, I'd thought driving to see Fred at work would be a safer alternative. Apparently, I was not getting out of talking.

"Nah, I don't really want to talk about it," I mumbled, eating a fry.

Fred threw his head back and let out a pained sound coming from his soul. "Seriously, I'm going to start charging people for the therapy I offer. You guys keep dropping here looking for something."

I laughed a little humourlessly, because he'd mentioned therapy. "What?"

Fred grabbed a fry too, and munched it. "Just spill it already dude, my break only lasts fifteen minutes."

I shrugged. Stared at my barely touched fries and burger. "It's nothing... I just well... actually went to therapy and I'm not sure how I feel about it yet."

Fred's whole posture suddenly changed. "Oh, shit, really?"

"Yeah..." I trailed.

"Did it go... well?" Fred asked, seeming genuinely concerned.

I ran a hand through my hair. I could talk about it. "I guess, yeah. It was just kind of strange. I rarely talk about the things I think about. It was just weird telling it to someone and having him kind of judging me for it."

"It's not judging though, it's more like nudging you in a better direction, mentally," Fred said a little thoughtfully.

"I guess," I said with a shrug.

"It's good that you did it though," Fred said, letting out a relieved breath, "not gonna lie, I do worry about you. Ever since that shit after Shawn's party."

"It was nothing," I replied automatically.

Fred raised an eyebrow at me, looking at me like he'd say Oh yeaaaah, reaaaaally? "No, dude, it wasn't nothing."

"I'm fine," I answered.

"You've been the opposite of fine for a while. You've seemed better lately though, I will give you that."

I smiled a little. "I have been feeling good lately, all things considered."

Fred mock-pushed me. "Stop saying it like it's a bad thing Blake. Jesus. I'm really glad you're going to therapy. Someone with credentials really needs to sit you down and figure out where all that self worth doubt is coming from."

It felt kind of weird, having my friend telling me this.

I rolled my eyes. "I don't have self worth problems."

Fred snorted. "You have zero self esteem. It's disturbing. Talk about that during your next session. Like, start with that, really. It's going to make your therapist's job easier."