The Smirking Jerk (Blake's POV)

Chapter 87

Chapter 87

I talked with my parents about this plan of mine in the evening.

Josh wasn't as enthusiast as I had thought he would.

"Whatever you feel will be the best for you, we'll support," my mother said, as we all sat eating at the dinning table.

My father was just staring at his plate, not saying anything.

Maybe another reason why I wanted to leave right now was so I wouldn't have to see the sadness and disappointment in my parents' faces.

After dinner, Josh sat beside the treadmill as I ran.

It was becoming a habit.

Josh was sitting there, his back against the wall, his arms crossed. "So, don't get me wrong, because I love you and I want you to be happy and this was kinda my idea, but are you really sure it's the right thing to leave right now?"

"It feels like the right thing," I said, rising the speed.

"But this feels like... running away."

"That's because it is running away," I replied, snorting.

Josh raised an eyebrow. "Yeah, and you're okay with that?"

I shrugged, and pushed my legs to keep up with the speed. "I just don't feel like I belong anymore. I don't feel like I should be here. I should be somewhere else. We should go visit some of Anita's family in Mexico. Let's bring her with us. They have an orange orchard. Don't you want to go pick oranges?"

Josh chuckled. "Sure, let's go pick oranges."

"And then we can head south. We haven't travelled much to South America. I want to go to Chile and see penguins. I want to see the Iguazú Falls in Argentina. Machu Picchu in Peru. Oh, Pride in Rio."

"So, you have it all figured out?" Josh asked, sighing.

I did. Well, I didn't, not really but the more I talked about it, the more it made sense. The more I could see myself packing a bag and never looking back. Go to places that didn't remind me of Lexi, or my family, or anything really. Just far away from here and far away from bad memories.

"We start with South America, and then we can go to Asia. We should stay in Thailand for at least three months so I can finally start speaking it properly."

Josh snorted. "Okay, so this trip of ours is a forever plan?"

"We'll become nomads."

"Nomads?"

I nodded. "Yep. I like that. I think that would be fun. We never stay anywhere longer than three months. I don't now Portuguese, so we could stay in Brazil for a little while at the beginning. It's got Latin bases, it shouldn't be that hard to learn."

Josh rolled his eyes at me. "Oh yes, that's totally what you should be focusing on right now."

"What's the issue? I asked.

"Are you hearing yourself?"

"Yes. This makes sense. These are good plans," I answered, a little defensively.

"Sure, great plans. In another context."

I frowned, slowing down. "I thought you wanted this. You offered this. You said we could just pack a bag and leave if this was what I needed."

"But I'm not sure that's what you need, that's the thing."

"And what do I need?"

Josh, smiled, "I don't know, that's the problem."