life would be better if jungkook did not have to live in this boarding school. he smiles, watching the happy passersby behind these guarded railings. they seem so content with the day given to them. oh, if he could kill the envy forming in his stomach.
he wonders what it would feel like to ride in a car, not that he has not, but what would it feel like to be free and lively without any boundaries. but of the car, of course. he would go to every place in the city, and the country. he would go everywhere, but here.
he cannot even get the bitter taste out of his mouth, it is like it is here to stay together with him until he finds a way out by himself.
the whistle blew, his teacher gained the attention of the gathered students and him. they all held saxophones in all of their poised fingers, while only jungkook's were shaking. he breathed his dread away but everyone blew in the instrument before him, making him anxious about how he could never remember the notes right.
he hated it when the teacher called him out for being oddly out of tune in every stanza of the song, and in every line on that. everyone looked at him, most puzzled and some snickering.
jungkook ducked his head low in humiliation, he hated this more than anything.
he realized he should not have got into an all-boys school, but it is never the decision of any of the students here. everyone expects everyone to be sculpted and motioned like a stone, it is so stupid to make five hundred clones of the same nature.
another whistle from the teacher kept him from his thoughts, this time, it was not about him, but the teacher was scolding a late-comer. jungkook just looked at the fuss from the side, like he always does.
-
jungkook would not be this lonely if his parents kept him near like they do with his brother, he supposed. he might have someone to spend the new year with, someone who would wish him a good birthday, someone who treated him as a part of this madness of a world.
he would not be so deserted after all, not in this boarding school at least.
there was always something about him that kept him away from the world. nobody really believes or likes to hear the word 'different' here, it really holds no value in this world. jungkook thinks it is better if he never voices is out. he smiled at himself, on his own misery.
he heard the curfew alarm go off, he sighed. the lights were automatically dimmed, he did not even shower, he wanted to wait until everyone was gone, but he was so secluded in his thoughts.
his roommates kept tattering in whispers while he was portrayed to be sleeping on the upper bunk bed. jungkook closed his eyes, in hopes of this night passing faster than trains.
but he could not sleep on his side, all of his roommates huddled on the bed under him, looking through the adult magazine with a small lamp. a tear drizzled down his iris, onto his round nose, and landing on his arm resting under his head.
there was no particular reason to cry anymore, he just did. he wiped his tear under the blanket when he heard his roommates shuffle up to open the door. not just them, multiple came out to hear the turbulence outside.
it would be foolish not to go, so jungkook got out too.
-
he saw the headmaster whipping a boy's back, the boy was supporting himself of his arms only. everyone watched as the headmaster cursed him with every hit, and the boy hissing after.
jungkook closed his eyes shut, he folded his fist in both fear and futility, he stopped moving at the ugliness of the image circling in his head. that could have been him, and all people would do is watch from afar as he does.
"now you all know what happens when you sneak out after the curfew, you don't want to end up like him," the oldest said and struck the stick again. "buying a take-out at this hour? this is not a hotel. you think - hey, get inside your rooms now!" he rambled and then appointed at the others, hitting the boy more.
the boy being clashed just chuckled bitterly, looking straight into jungkook's orbs.
in terror, all of the students rushed in but halted when they saw jungkook standing in the way of the headmaster.
-
jungkook contemplated, he did not know whether he should remove his shirt or not. he was in the bathroom, with the boy. they stood in front of each other. but only the other boy stripped.
"we don't have all night." the other boy said, taking off his pants, jungkook looked away that very moment.
"i'm gonna change inside." jungkook rumbled, he tried going to the first cubicle but he felt a hold on his wrist, backing him.
"you're tough enough to stand up for me, but you can't undress in front of others?" the voice came from behind jungkook that paused him. the boy chuckled, still with slight venom that was not too negative.
jungkook turned around to see the naked boy - covered by his boxers - smiling a bit crazily. but jungkook being jungkook could have never looked straight at his eyes or body, so he glanced away. "b-but i don't know you."
"wha-" the boy began but chuckled at his own foolery. "oh, i'm taehyung. the boy who snuck out tonight and got his ass beaten."
"uh, yeah, i saw. you're new?" jungkook asked taehyung and got a nod in response. "hmm, take a shower, they'll come and check the restrooms in a while."
taehyung grinned like his whole back was not aching to death. he was a weird one, with an unnatural nature, forgive the irony. he walked into the first cubicle.
"wait! t-there's no hot water in there, only the last one has it." jungkook managed to inform the unaware taehyung, who now nodded observantly.
-
and here stood jungkook, utterly naked as well in front of taehyung who was taking a shower with him. they soon figured that it was for the best if they take a shower together, they did not want to be in trouble further. jungkook did not, at least.
jungkook tried to cover up his body by faintly draping his own arms over himself, but he knew it did little to no job. he felt overly revealed, something you should not bother in an all-boys, but he did.
"you shouldn't have." taehyung spoke, turning off the faucet above him.
"what?"
"you shouldn't have stood up for me, back there." taehyung expressed.
"then no one else will." jungkook said gingerly like his words did not mark til depth in taehyung.
"let me help, to, you know, wash you in return for all those whipping you took." taehyung said guiltily, he smiled even then. letting his breath relax. he turned jungkook around and looked at his bare back.
it was all wounded and dinged, taehyung's eyes softened at the sight, it was not as bad as his own, he knew but he can not just let the thought slide. jungkook took a few hits for him, and all he knows is his name, plus that's just now.
he traced a line over all the scratches, getting a few hisses from the boy he is holding, who was standing as firmly as possible, trying not to give away his nerves.
-
在这个世界
⫽in this world⫽
