Misfits (#2)

53.

Violet.
THREE WEEKS LATER

I'm not sure how twenty days can feel like a century. But maybe when your spirit wears away, minute by minute, time feels a lot more excruciatingly slow.

I don't know anything about Rockley Academy. Not anything more than I'd learnt after my first arrival, when Roman Beckett had walked me to my building.

I'd briefly understood the lay of the land. There's been parties and mixers around campus, preparing for the start of the school year in September. I don't want to think about the school year. I don't want to think about this academy. I don't want to do anything but lay in bed, lifeless and empty. If I'm not missing Everest, I feel nothing else. If it's not loneliness, it's nothing.

I'm rotting away in this dorm room. Fading, day by day.

Even now as I lie curled up, my eyes burning from a lack of sleep and my stomach aching with hunger. I don't feel the need to get up or take care of myself and I know if I call Everest, he'd urge me to. So I don't.

I can barely muster up the strength to talk to Everest. To anyone, but especially him. To reply, to call. We talk and I can hear our hearts breaking behind every word, as much as we tiptoe around it. So I'm doing what I do best - avoiding.

Avoiding the hurt that I don't want to feel for every moment we're apart. Talking to him hurts. Everything hurts here.

I try to shut my eyes, knowing sleep won't come but I get a notification from my phone.

I know who it is without looking. My heart falls straight to my feet. I glance over and see that he's sent a picture. I unlock my phone and as soon as I see it, a small smile splits my face. It's Miguel and Benji, grinning at the camera, with one text.

Ev: hey, beautiful. we miss you.
yours sincerely, the hottest guys here.

I'm assuming Miguel stole Everest's phone. Their smiles are radiant and god, I miss them too. All of them. Ria calls me every morning and manages to give me a little strength, Val facetimes whilst she bakes but I hide how miserable I've become, as best I can.

It's become routine. A part of me hates that it's all become routine because it solidifies that I'm here. That whether I like it or not, I have to settle in here and learn to live far away from them.

I think I've cried more in the past three weeks than I've ever cried in my life and Daphne, my roommate, most probably thinks I'm a fucking weirdo. Thankfully, she's not a bitch. Neither of us are sociable so it works perfectly, keeping to our own company.

My phone ringing startles me and Daphne looks over her shoulder, wearing her big glasses and hair in two braids. I mutter, "Sorry."

She returns to the heap of work on her desk and I pick up the phone call from Valencia.

"Hey, ballerina." Val's soft voice sounds out.

I sit up, bring my knees to my chest and try to bring life to my voice, "Hey, crazy. What are you doing up?"

It's almost one in the morning and Val always sleeps early. I look out of our window, dark encompassing the sky as I wrap the comforter around myself like a burrito.

"We ordered pizza and Benji had too much Pepsi. He hasn't slept so we haven't either." She says, "So, did you explore like we told you to, bug?"

I stay silent. Ria and Val had formulated a plan to get me out of my room, insisting that there's no harm in checking out the place. They tried to persuade me by saying I could find good places to hide out and get fresh air.