waves~ || skz Jeongin

spicy~

The interview would be for a small independent news magazine called SPICE.Y, Felix told me.

SPICE.Y didn't just write, they also did podcasts. That's modern, they told me.

Felix's make up brand had had a few commercial deals with them last year, that's how they got to know each other. Now SPICE.Y was struggling a little with numerous competitive magazines, so Felix was happy to help them out with our big story.

Also, as they were indipendent and relatively unknown, I trusted them more to be actually interested in our story and not just money.

In ten minutes, we were scheduled for an interview with their top editor that would later be aired as a podcast episode. Then we would have a little photoshoot and be the cover issue of their next print magazine - Christmas special. Yay.

Their office was on one of the top floors of a skyscraper in downtown Seoul, thankfully not far from Hongjoong's club.

He brought us, hugged us goodbye fiercely with good luck wishes and the promise to meet him for some shopping soon.

The elevator ride dragged on for minutes and minutes.

I was uncomfortably nervous.

This was my first interview and overall public apppereance since Harin was born. And right now the general public saw me as a dirty cheater and fraud and I somehow had to make that right again.

And, besides that, it was my first time being out in public while wearing woman's - being a woman. Being one, presenting as one.

I was dying of nervousness. Felix seemed entirely calm. Yet we had spent enough time as famous idols that I could see through their calm mask and tell even they were a little unsettled about this.

The way they couldn't stop to fix their hair in the mirrored wall of the elevator.

'It looks great' I said to make them stop.

They sighed and straightened up. 'You know what? We both look fabulous. We both are amazing. And I'm happy to be here with you'

Felix pulled me in a sideways hug, so we both saw our reflection.

And hell, that felt good.

It was foreign so see myself like this but I couldn't look away, couldn't get enough.

Felix looked even better.

They had this easy elegance to them that I still had to learn. The confidence that radiated from them. Everyone could clock in a second how comfortable they were in their own skin.

I pulled my shoulders back a little, stood up a tick straighter.

Felix fished an untamed stray of hair from my face and swiped it aside.

'Perfect, baby'

The elevator dinged, the doors slid open.

Neither Felix nor I made any move to get off.

I think we needed a moment to collect ourselves.

After a handful seconds, Felix took their phone and snapped a few pictures of us in the mirror.

We looked goddamn good.

'I've always dreamed to do something like this with you' they confessed while we were making funny faces at the camera.

'You mean being spied on, outed in a nation wide cheating scandal and getting simultaneously dumped by our girlfriends?'

They pulled a face while I had to laugh. That whole story was so ridiculous.