waves~ || skz Jeongin

Felipe~

Hello, here is Jihye. I'm probably busy right now so please leave a message if it's important or just write me a text. Thank you, have a nice day!

~beep~

'Uhm.. Hi, Jihye. Ji-ji. I'm - It's me. I- I hope you and Harin are doing alright. Give her a kiss from me please. I- I miss the two of you so much. Oh my god. I'm sorry. I'm giving you space.

I just wanted to tell you that you forgot one of Harin's plushies. The blue fox, you know? Should I- Should I sent it after you so she has it? She likes to cuddle it so much-

Oh and you also forgot your favourite dress - it was in the wash when you... You know. I could send it together with Harin's plushie?

Or I don't know. I'm sorry I'm talking so long.

I'll hang up now.

I ... I love you.'

I stared at my blank phone screen.

Tears rolled over my cheeks.

I missed both of them so goddamn much.

One second we were a happy family and the next - everything was ruined.

Because of me.

I was so stupid.

There was nothing in the world that was worth going through this hell.

I took Harin's plushie. And pressed it to my chest.

Fuck.

Me, the pathetic sob story.

I was alone.

In our - my - home.

It was the first time I've been here since my breakdown after Jihye left.

Being here, all alone, everything that happened really hit.

Jihye was gone.

Harin, too.

When I had stepped through the door, I couldn't help but hope for my daughter to come running towards me, greeting me with a hug. Jihye leaning in the doorway and smiling at me with that special small smile only me or Harin would ever get to see.

They weren't there, of course.

The house was empty, and terribly so.

I had been about one minute here when I already wanted to turn around and run away.

I didn't. I stayed strong.

And I had nowhere to run to, to be honest.

I had camped two nights on Chan's couch, which was two more than one should sleep on that horrible rock thing. Their other children were back home as well, Chan had some work things to do and Younhee needed space.

I took Mr. Bubbles for a walk and then said goodbye for now, leaving them some rest.

I couldn't crash with Felix either. They hadn't set a foot in their house since we found the cameras. They and Coco moved in with Hyunjin for now. I couldn't blame them, after all that happened.

So, here I was, back home.

I thought, home. These empty rooms and hallways didn't feel all that much like home.

Home. Jihye and Harin. My family, that was home.

Ah, fuck.

Maybe it was for the best to have a bit time for myself. Maybe I could entangle some of the colourful emotions-bundle in my head, process all that happened. Maybe. Or I'd make it all worse.