A Fine Line (Being Rewritten into The Pursuit of a King)

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I’m so sorry about the wait guys I know it’s unacceptable. I’ll try and get the next chapter out much faster.

As she was escorted back to her chambers, Violet jammed her knuckle in between her teeth to keep from screaming. She could feel the panic thundering in her chest in response to the ultimatum Phillip had presented her with. She was hopelessly attracted to him, that was easy ascertainable. He looked at her like no one ever had before, like she was something good and innocent and without fault. William had never made her feel so wanted.

Phillip had also managed to stroke the dark thing within her that was attempting to claw its way out.

Violet attempted to convince herself that it was for William’s benefit that she was considering the proposal. After all, his life had been expressly threatened in the terms of it.

However she knew this was not true. This, like every other decision she made was about her. In truth, she menacingly revelled in the idea of being wicked, of being her true ruthless and ambitious self. She delighted in the idea that what she had hoped and begged for so obsequiously; she could now snatch by force.

The knowledge that with a single response in the affirmative she could have a new husband, a new title, in essence a new life revitalized her beyond belief. She almost turned to the guard beside her and demanded he take her back to Phillip. After all who would say no to a completely new existence when the present one was so innately loathsome?

Her resolution was shaken only once she was unceremoniously shoved back into the chambers she shared with William. Was this truly the way she wanted to seize her dreams from the cold, dead, clutches of her sister? What kind of person would she be thought of then? A voice within gleefully asserted that it did not matter an ounce what others thought of her when she was the most powerful woman in the kingdom. Perhaps when she was Queen the fingers of anxious fear would not clutch at her at night, the urge to be remembered dominated the shred of morality she still held.

“Violet?” William called out to her evidently having heard her enter. She attempted to compose herself before entering the bedroom, he could not know of the internal struggle threatening to consume her whole. Night had fallen while Phillip had assailed her; she grasped a candle in her shaking hands and forced herself to face her husband.

“Violet what is the matter?” he asked squinting against the light she brought into the room. She wanted nothing more than to unburden herself, yet he would not understand her dilemma. William had always been the moral high-ground type and she could not bear to hear his condescending reproaches.

“What did he do to you?” he demanded sitting up suddenly before wincing.

“You have woken up!” she forced a smile on her face and came to sit beside him. Her false joy profoundly evident, even to her own ears. She tentatively moved and sat beside him on the edge of the bed. Violet could feel his sceptical look but refused to meet it. Instead, she fiddled aimlessly with the vials of medicine left by the strange healer.

“Yes, I am awake, I hear thanks to you” he acceded gruffly. She did not acknowledge his gratitude but it did not irk him as it usually would. At this moment his own particular brush with death was the furthest thing from his mind. William sat up further, snatching a few pillows from the other side of the bed to support himself.

“Now” he demanded grasping her hand in his “Tell me what did he want with you? If he hurt you I shall murder him, did he-”

“No” Violet replied quickly. She did not know what possessed her to defend the man. “I see your bruises have all but disappeared” she gave her husband a tight smile.

“Indeed?” William grinned pulling the blanket further down to reveal more of his bare chest, inspecting the bruising that remained.

He knew she was being deliberately evasive on the subject of that bastard Phillip, yet he knew that he could not bring himself to push her. Not when she was now so close to him, not now when she was almost close enough to touch. William instinctively moved forward towards her yet restrained himself.

This cruel woman he called his wife still had the power to captivate him, though the rational voice within screamed that she did not deserve his love. To an extent it was true, she had rebuffed and ridiculed him at every turn, making it obvious that she did not desire to be tethered to him so. However his heart seemed to work independent of his mind and he had resigned himself to the fact that whatever Violet did or said, he would always love her.

“So…you fair better then?” she asked swivelling towards him and breaking the silence. She never could stand silence, always wishing to be engaged in something other than her own thoughts. Periods of reflection to Violet were always things to be avoided.

“I am glad.” She was perturbed when William scowled and released her hand.

“I do not wish us to talk like strangers” he responded vehemently, meeting her puzzled gaze.

“Well how do you wish us to talk?” Violet asked suddenly annoyed “We are not friends, nor lovers. We are strangers you and I, what do I know of you or you of me?”

She crossed her arms and glared at him, all her previous sentiment forgotten.

“I know everything about you Violet!” William retorted “Before we married I being the fool that I was endeavoured to learn everything from your favourite flower to your preferred dish. I thought that these were the things to make you happy, yet now I know the only thing that sustains you is the misery of others!”

“I refuse-”

“Oh I agree that our match is one of equal hatred, but that was your decision not mine. If we are estranged it is because you demand it so. Contrary to what you believe I did not marry your for your dowry, or your father’s influence, I married you because I loved you with my entire soul and on the night that I saw you I thought you were the most amazing woman I had ever beheld.” When she did not respond he continued

“And you destroyed me. You made it clear that my inferior position dominated any other merits I might have had. So we are neither friends nor lovers but you shall not talk to me as a stranger, not when I have had you so thoughtlessly close to my heart.”

Violet was silent and stared down at her hands. After a few moments William had almost given up on coercing her to speak to him again that evening. He had crossed the boundaries of their superficial conversation and spoken truth.

“And now?” she asked in a small voice almost inaudible.

“What?”

“And now?” she asked again “Where do I stand now?”

William balked at this opportunity she gave him to declare his love anew. He could not stand the thought of being rebuffed as he had countless times before.

“Now it does not matter” he spat “What is done has been done!”

“I must know!” she cried out with an anguish that surprised him. She turned and clung to him almost desperately with an expression he had never seen before.

“Why?” he replied in a low voice “Does it give you pleasure to humiliate me further? What if I no longer love you? What if I have seen the devil you are?”

“Is that true?” Violet asked looking into his eyes searchingly “Have you let me go?”

William was about to deliver a scathing reply if only to spite her yet he stopped himself. He was a prisoner in this castle and would most likely die in it. There was no point in denying what he suspected she already knew.

“God knows I have tried” he responded irritably “But it seems I will have no peace in this world. Even now I still believe you will change, even now I love you”

Team Phillip? Team William?

I personally still haven't decided who I like better...

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