In The Spotlight

Bubble- Cinnamon Bun

I felt inspected. A camera peering in on me. It was picking me apart, like a frog being dissected for seventh grade biology. I sensed myself begin to swear, though I wasn't sure whether it was from the bright lights shining down, or my own anxiety. I was stressed. And tired of worrying.

I spent too many hours wondering if they'd know. Asking myself if someone somehow had figured it out. I stood in that stupid crowd worrying. I sat on that Zoom meeting worrying.

Were my eyes too wide? Had anyone noticed that I was terrified? I saw flashing in my mind's eye. I was haunted by the images.

Google.

I had cheated. I looked up 3 answers for the application quiz. Maybe it wouldn't have mattered. Maybe I would've been here anyway. The dry, swollen feeling in my mouth and tongue told me that wasn't true. When the mystery person told us we'd get to know each other that well, I almost peed myself. I tried to steady my breaths and focus on their voice.

"So, first order of business: names! I am 4. This-" they turned the camera around to show a much friendlier, approachable looking individual. "-is X. No, you may not ask if it's short for anything. No, you may not give us nicknames." They looked gravely into the camera with that, as if something might happen if we disobeyed. It didn't make me feel better.

"Okay, now the fun begins! I'm sending you into breakout rooms for your future teams! I will send a list of questions for you each to answer as you introduce yourself. Good luck!" With that, they disappeared and were replaced by a black box displaying their name.

As the breakout rooms loaded, I did everything I could not to leave the meeting. Chewed on my lip, tapped my foot (really my whole leg), played with my hair. I took a deep breath and pretended I was fine.

Everyone was in the breakout room, but it was quiet for what felt like forever. Finally, breaking the infinite silence, a long haired, thin, slightly angular looking woman spoke. "If you all don't mind, I'll go ahead." No one objected.

"I'm Lollipop. Well, basically everyone calls me Lolli. I am 25 years old, and I am a forensic scientist. Difficult job. I've lived everywhere, but right now I'm in SoCal." Although I hate it when people say 'SoCal'- how much harder can it possibly be to use 4 more syllables?- I was relieved there was someone in my age group. That gave me enough confidence to go next.

"Uh, hey! I'm Bubble. I have a bit of an accent, I know. I'm 23, I'm getting my masters degree in sociology. Right now I work at Disney World, actually! I live in Orlando." I think they bought my peppy persona. I tried to seem upbeat so they didn't notice the shaking or my otherwise freaking out.

But no one questioned me. The next person just introduced himself. A man with glasses and unruly brown hair. "I'm TB. I'm an environmental scientist. Just turned 29 last week actually. I live in New York. The city, not just the state." He sounded nearly as nervous as me. Good to know I'm not the only worry-wart around here.

"It's funny that's your name, TB. I'm GB. We're the B's!" The next to speak up was a textbook nerd. Thick, large, goggle-like glasses, dark circles beneath her eyes, and frizzy curled hair.

"I'd refrain from calling us B's, maybe?" He had a good point. I wouldn't want to be called a B. At least not if I was going to be on TV.

"Okay, sorry. Anyway, I'm from New Hampshire, I'm 28, and I'm a biochemist. Pretty interesting line of work actually. Takes a lot of work to even get into. Not just anyone can do what I do, you know?" She probably would have kept talking if the final member of our team hadn't piped up. I was very grateful when they did. So far, GB was my least favorite.

"Biochemistry is very interesting. Seems so, anyway. I'm a restaurant owner, I wouldn't know. Name's Gelatin, by the way. Got ahead of myself there. 26 years of age. Michigan, born and raised." I actually like this one. Gelatin at least is acting like a human being. He's the least scary of the bunch. He might've actually been fun to hang with in another lifetime.