Coiny- Tell All, Secrets Revealed

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Sunday Morning sat on a metal folding chair beside Pin, I took a sip of coffee and closed my eyes. I was about to bring up a sore subject. Her eyes- blue again today- were far too calm for the occasion.

Too late to turn back now.

Once the clock struck 9, I stood. "Hello, thank you for coming!" Silence. "Tough crowd." Silence. This is going just swell. "I actually have something important to discuss." A few people nodded, and I finally felt like I wasn't just speaking directly into the void.

I cleared my throat and looked at my talking points. "What would you do if you saw something bad? Something that might get someone you know and like in trouble. Something... secret. Would you turn them in? Maybe, tell your loved ones? Or keep it to yourself?"

Most eyes were now on me. "I saw something of that nature recently, and I want to discuss what to do about it."

A few hands shot up. "Um, Golf Ball, sure." I pointed to the woman, who then lowered her arm.

"Did it have to do with someone in this room?" She ran her fingers through her messy poof of hair.

"Yes, that's why I brought it up. Puffball, go for it."

"It feels wrong to talk about that person like this." She swung her legs back and forth.

I shrugged. "I'm not using their name, or revealing any details, so I think it's okay. How about Ruby?"

She squinted. "Yeah, uh, why am I even here?"

"Power in numbers. Firey?"

"Do I know about the thing you're talking about?"

I pinched the bridge of my nose, lowering my head. "We're not playing twenty questions. Does anyone have any insight on the actual topic? Or was this a massive waste of time?"

Many hands went down, but one remained. Leafy began to speak. "If I may, I believe we have a duty to each other to keep secrets. How can we trust anyone otherwise?" She had a way with words that made me incredibly jealous. The way her hands and her head moved as she talked felt natural and supplemental to the sentences themselves.

I grinned. "See? This is what I'm talking about. Anyone want to add or maybe disagree?"

Pin looked at me and mouthed 'can I?' I nodded and she stood. "I think that we should tell everything to those in this room. Then we all are on the same page."

Tennis Ball started, without raising his hand. "That's simply a logistical issue. We have no way of proving what is or isn't being hidden from us. Some of us will be vulnerable."

"I agree with him!" Shouted Flower, who hadn't even looked up from her phone until now.

"I'm sure we could find a workaround. We already know someone has a secret, it's only-" Whatever strategy Donut was going to propose would have to be used another time.

"Stop." Said the woman, interjecting. Lifting her head revealed it was Bubble. I smiled wider. She wasn't a huge talker, but I got even her engaged!

"Do you have something to say? Go on!"

She stood up, straight and tall. "I hate hearing you guys talk like this. So vague. Yep, I cheated! Feast your eyes! I'm the one who's not smart enough to be here! I knew Firey would tell you. This is ridiculous." The room erupted into gasps and yells. She sat back down, her eyes all watery.

I had no clue what she was talking about. "What? No! I wasn't even talking about you!" This only caused more chaos.

I was so sucked into the fact that there had been 2 people hiding something, I hardly noticed the accusatory screams. I didn't notice when Bubble left the room, only that her spot was vacant.

I started paying attention when, through the racket, Tennis Ball shouted in a booming voice I didn't know he was capable of. "Shut up!" A hush fell over the room, and then he continued. "I know who he was talking about."

I protested, as did GB, strangely enough. I didn't think her the type to come to Cake's defense. TB whispered something to her, and she too went silent. "Well, what is it?" Pin yelled impatiently.

"He's not talking about Bubble because he meant he found out about me and Golf Ball. We're together." Everyone began to discuss, more civil this time. Other than the less than happy couple, that is, who were arguing a bit too loud.

This second declaration was met with less surprise, but to me it was plain annoying. "Not you either, and stop guessing!"

That didn't do much. Everyone continued to air their dirty laundry. Pin tugged on my shirt sleeve. "What do we do? This isn't going well!"

I pushed my hair out of my eyes. "You honestly believe I don't see that? Just think of something, fast!" I became aware of my frantic arm waving, and I quickly tucked them behind my back.

She rolled her eyes, then stood up, reminding me just how much taller and more intimidating she is than me. "Everyone, quit talking!" Her voice cracked as it raised to such an unnaturally high volume.

All their eyes fell on her, and she looked at me as if asking my approval. "Go on," I whispered.

She cleared her throat. "How about..." She paused and studied her shoes. "How about anyone who wants to confess to some dirty secret can go one at a time." After a beat, she added, "Anyone who tells anybody outside of this room will be punished severely."

I nodded. That sounded good enough to me. "All in favor say 'aye,'" I said, smiling to myself. I always wanted to say that.

Surprisingly, a chorus of 'aye's sounded. "Who wants to go first?" More people than I expected raised their hands. "I'll just go alphabetically by first name. I don't know y'all's last names, so... Cake."

He rose from his seat wearing history's guiltiest expression, like a puppy who tore the house up while its owner was away. "I hate to say this. I've... had romantic encounters with Loser." Everybody's mouths fell open. Everybody other than Pin, Firey, Leafy, and I, I suppose. "No, the other critically acclaimed triple threat- Yes, that Loser!" He said, rising anger in his tone, when questioned.

But soon the room settled, and that was that. The thing that had kept me up at night, that had wandered through my mind whenever my thoughts were quiet or peaceful, gone. Done with.

He sat back down, Pin called on Donut, and Cake and Loser were all but forgotten.

Donut inhaled, and shook his head. "I'm not usually as nice as I seem here." He smoothed his pants, the room quietly staring at him.

Gelatin broke the silence. "Well, shit! How bitchy are you normally?"

Donut blinked at him. "We will be having words."


Most people's confessions weren't a big deal. Gelatin came out, shocking no one other than Snowball, whose gaydar needs a software update. Fanny announced she is actually only 5 feet and 4.5 inches, despite my having no recollection she ever said otherwise. Firey told us he was actually piss-poor, which got no response besides an annoyed Fries's "Well, yeah, you're a teacher."

When it was Leafy's time to shine, she chose to speak for her friend. "Bubble isn't here," she said, "so I will give you the facts."

Tension hung over the room, and you could hear a pin drop in those seconds before she spoke again.

"She only cheated on 2 questions. She's still really smart, most likely smart enough to be here. She regrets it, badly. I'm sure she hopes you all aren't mad."

No one was having it.

That was, not until the double doors clicked open, and there was Bubble, head hung in shame.

(1318 words. Song of the day: Don't You (Forget About Me)- Simple Minds)

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