In The Spotlight

Firey- Reasons

It's a difficult question to answer. Why should I get a million dollars? Why?

'Because I will have earned it' really isn't enough for most people to be satisfied, so, why? Why should I win instead of Coiny? My best friend?

That's the question that popped into my mind once the shock of Leafy's loss wears off. It's funny. It's a difficult question to answer, and the only one asking is me.

Where was I on this day last year? I actually know the answer to that question. Sitting in the concrete parent pick up loop with a little boy. He had sandy blonde hair, and he was the only one there.

"Do you know where your mom is?" I asked him. "Rocky, it's been almost an hour since school let out."

He just looked up at me with big sad eyes.

"I would take you home but I think that's illegal." He nodded slightly. "Can you imagine me in jail?"

This got a tiny laugh out of him. He shook his head.

"Do you know your mom's phone number?"

He chewed on his lip. Then he nodded.

I handed him a legal pad and a pencil. "Can you write it down for me?"

Rocky wiped a tear from his face. Then he wrote stranger danger.

"I'm not a stranger. I'm your teacher, at least for today. I'll even call her on the school phone so you know I won't keep her number." I took his little hand between mine. "Okay?"

He pulled his hand away, but he nodded. He wrote down a number.

I stood up and looked back down at the little guy. "Come with me to the office." He shook his head and pointed at the spot he sat in. "Oh. Why do want to stay here?" I bent my legs so I was again on his level.

He wrote if mommy comes.

If.

"Okay. Do you know Ms. Browning?" He smiled and gave me a thumbs up. "Was she your kindergarten teacher." He nodded happily. "I'm gonna get her to stay with you, okay?"

He gave me two thumbs up this time. I grabbed my walkie talkie and pressed the button. "Hey, Gaty, can you come and watch a kid for me? I've got to go call his mom."

Through all the static, I heard her say, "I'll be right there."

For a minute I sat and talked to Rocky. He didn't have a lot of feedback seeing as I've never once heard him talk, but it was nice to see him smile.

What really made him happy was when I reminded him of the Super Bowl party his class had thrown the week before. Apparently they had pizza, and judging by the excited arm movement I got in response, Rocky loves pizza.

Eventually, Gaty showed up with her classic high ponytail and sat down next to us. I told Rocky goodbye and turned to leave.

But, suddenly, I felt something 2nd grader sized latched onto my leg. "Oh, hey dude. What's up?"

He motioned for me to come closer, so I stopped down to his eye level.

And then he spoke.

Just a few words, but enough to make me cry.

"Thank you for staying here and talking until my mommy comes."

I gave him a little hug.

Once I dialed the number it rang a few times, then someone finally picked up.

"Hi, ma'am, this is C. Huang Elementary calling. Are you going to pick up your child?" I asked in my sweetest, politest, bullshit voice. I was pissed at this woman for abandoning Rocky. I'd subbed in his classes a handful of times, and although he was definitely a man of few words, he was always eager to learn. He deserved better.

The woman's voice came through the phone all raspy like she'd been a long time smoker. I don't like smokers. "Do you ask every parent that? It's only been 5 minutes. Jesus fuck!"

I rolled my eyes. "No. Ma'am, it's actually early release day, and your child's been sitting here for about an hour. So, are you on your way? After an hour and a half we are obligated to take him inside the school and take care of him due to his age. We just wanted to let you know."

"I'm on my way, and fuck you for thinking I forgot about my child. I might as well transfer Rocky to a different school." Okay, Karen.

And she literally did forget about her kid. Or at least she forgot it was Wednesday. "How far away are you, ma'am?"

"10 minutes." And then she hung up.

I kind of like talking with parents, usually. It makes me feel like a real teacher. It tends to only happen when I'm helping out with afterschool care, or when I have to call home for a behavior issue. Most of the time, they are courteous, respectful, and helpful.

Most of the time.

I'd never been sworn at by a mom before. It's kind of degrading. It is also annoying in a way that I'd never experienced before. Like you aren't even deserving of their kindness.

I'm sorry, I'm not even earning enough to afford a house. I live in a fucking mobile home. Did I buy it? No. My grandparents just died and my parents let me use it. What do you want from me?

More patience? More kindness? I don't have any to spare for you. Sorry.

But I'm not really sorry. I am sorry that I'm being overworked and underpaid. I am sorry that there are so few teachers that still want to teach in this economy that I was subbing for a language arts class for a straight month before they could get a real educator in that position.

But I'm not sorry I was too short with you for your liking, ma'am.

The woman's car pulled up. It was red and shiny, relatively expensive looking.

Before Rocky left, I made sure to give him a little hug. He waved through the window at me and Gaty as they drove off.

I sighed and turned to Gaty. "Do you ever wanna have kids?" I asked her.

She shrugged. "I don't have the money. I hope so. Maybe one day." She looked at the cloudy sky. "What about you, Firey?"

"I do. I just... I haven't met the right person. You know?" She nodded. "And yeah, when I have a kid, I'm gonna spoil them. Gotta have that cash money." I joked, doing the making-it-rain motion.

"You're a weirdo."

"I know." I shrugged. "Is that really a bad thing?"

"No."

"You're a good friend."

"Thanks." She smiled. "So are you."

I realize this now. As I stand here in this studio, that I'm in reach of the 2 things I always wanted.

The money is so close. So close.

And I'm here with the person I care so deeply for.

You know what? Scratch that. I'm looking in her eyes, and I know, I love her. I'm in love with Leafy. I love her long, soft hair, I love her sparkly eyes, I love her stupidly bubbly smile. I love the way she waves her hands around every which way when she talks. I love how she kisses. I love the way she says my name like it's the most amusing thing she's ever heard.

I'm in love with her.

If it's weird to say that so soon, then color me a fucking weirdo.

I don't care. I'm going to Paris. I'm going to Paris with the love of my life.

(A/N: Hey y'all. Sorry for the flashback instead of advancing the plot but... yk, buildup. I'm mean. Anywayyy, love yall! 2 chapters left and then the epilogue. We're closing in. 1298 words. Song for the day: Lover- Taylor Swift.)