In The Spotlight

Pin- Eyes

I glanced one last time into the reflective surface of the elevator wall one last time before it opened.

Today my eyes are brown.

Just like they always used to be before the contacts.

I walk in the room, where everyone is googling over a stringy looking tween of unknown origin. Good for them.

I don't really care too much.

I look at my... Well he isn't my friend anymore is he? The person who used to be my friend, anyway, for a fraction of a second. I still worry he sees me looking. I shouldn't have hurt him like I did.

He seems good. Which is good.

If he's okay, then I don't have to worry, so I start to walk over to my teammates, him included.

Then I turn. The chatter has picked back up, after a brief pause due to everyone marveling over Leafy's Plus One. So, I go to her instead.

"Hey, can we talk for a sec?" I ask her politely.

She seems fine with that. "Grassy, you go find yourself a seat. Or ask X where to go. The person with the funny hat." I look. It was a rather funny hat. Off Grassy goes, presumably to X. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine. Can we freshen up?"

"Pin, there are like 15 minutes before the show starts," she says, furrowing her brow.

I smile. "We'll be back in time."

Once we arrive in the bathroom, I notice the concerned, squinted eyes on Leafy's face. "Are you actually okay? You're freaking me out."

"Yeah I'm good." I say. It was a perfectly normal thing to say, and the truth.

So why did my voice squeak when I said it?

I continue. "I just- Coiny and I got into a huge fight. Both of us said things that were out of line, but I did especially. I wanted some advice." More squeaks came.

Her eyes tilt back and for a second (but a second too long) you could hear a pin drop. But she starts talking again, to my relief. "I'm- well I was a lawyer. Give me the deets, man!" Her brow furrows again. "Dear god, I sound like Firey."

So I recount the events from Friday night word for word. Well, to the best of my ability. I might not have remembered exactly what he said. But, what I said, I knew. This funny thing happens when you throw daggers through the heart of an innocent man- the memory resurfaces over and over, and you know what you did right down to how your fingers were placed on the knives.

She said only "Wow."

"I don't want him to hate me. I don't believe what I said anymore, and I'm disgusted with myself. How bad is it? Tell the truth." The words cascade from my lips, like one of those chocolate fountains, but a lot less sweet.

"Do you want friend Leafy, or professional damage control Leafy?"

"Damage control! Give it to me straight, doc."

"You're fucked." There was a glassy quality to her eyes. Not sad, not exactly. Hurt.

I wipe some nonexistent sweat off of my forehead. "What do I do now?"

She laughs, but not like how you would when something is funny. "Pin, what do you normally do when you screw something up?"

"I don't know! I've never screwed up this bad before."

"You put on your big girl pants, and you apologize."

Round 2 was going well! Really well, actually. And I'm not just saying that. We were getting all the answers right, and Coiny and I had so far avoided directly speaking to each other.