Echo

Scared to Live

I still remember my heart dropping when I saw her face. She had no life in her eyes, like before. I blankly watched Cody carve Mom, into the tree we buried her next to.

"Cody?" I whispered, trying to keep my voice from breaking. She walked toward me slowly but I couldn't move.

I could've saved her too.

Cody grabbed the knife out of my grip gently, and walked toward her. He held her back for a minute, and just looked at her. He pierced her skull and laid her onto the ground gently. He silently cried and mumbled to her. I couldn't hear what he was saying over my heartbeat. I wiped my face and realized I was crying too.

I blinked away the moment I keep replaying constantly. Is my dad walking around, without life in his eyes? Is my brother?

He sat down by the tree so I sat beside him, "I think," He scoffed lightly and wiped his eyes, "I think it's better this way, at least I know where she is."

I nodded lightly, trying not to think about where my family is. He rested his elbows on his knees and put his head down as he messed with stray grass.

"Do you want to find some flowers for her?" he looked up at me, his eyes dulled. I got on my feet and listened for the creek, where most of the flowers rest.

"Yeah," he said after a while.

He followed me until we saw a small creek. There were some white flowers and some purplish ones. I cut the stem with my knife, trying to keep them in an organized bouquet.

When I was done and had a hand full of flowers, I looked over at Cody and saw him staring into space. "Here," I said snapping him out of it and handing him the bouquet. We walked back and he laid them up against the tree nicely.

"We need to get back," he said, getting up from his knee.

"We can stay a little longer if you want." He shook his head and we started walking east, toward the station.

The whole walk was silent, which I didn't mind. But I couldn't stop wondering how Cody is feeling right now. I can't tell if he's angry, or sad, or both. He kept the same expression the whole time, just dull.

The police station was in view and it got closer and closer until people were opening the gates thrillingly. Molly, Cali, and Brandon suffocated us in a hug,

"Are you guys okay? We were so worried. Lincoln said it wasn't safe to go back yet, but I knew you guys were okay. I knew it." Cali sighed her nose and eyes slightly red.

"It's good to see you guys," Brandon said whole heartedly like he couldn't believe it. Like he'd seen a ghost.

Molly only hugged us, her warm embrace saying it all. The way she looked at us made me think she was seeing right through us. She always looked at us like she knew how we felt. She could feel Cody's sadness like it was radiation.

"Cody, Echo!" We heard Olli and he instantly hugged both our legs tightly, "I was scared." he whispered.

"We're okay buddy, we wouldn't ever leave you..right Echo?" Cody asked looking at me expectingly. He knew I was second guessing everything. Second guessing staying.

"Right," I nodded and picked him up, giving him a huge hug, shaking him side to side making him laugh. I handed him to Cody and Cali hugged me again,

"You're our family now too." She said. I rested my head on her shoulder and hugged her back, not sure if I felt sad or glad. I never know what i'm feeling anymore, every feeling now days is just a corruption to the numbness.