Mon Amour

Authors note

Ok apologizing in advance bc I ain't using punctuation on this one

Ok so super sorry abt not posting I've been SO BUSY I hate school it literally takes up all my time

But as my apology for no chapter I'll tell you a lil story from my life that should keep y'all entertained until I can write again(I lied I actually will use punctuation for this):

Let me set the scene: I'm in gym class, we just had to do the pacer test, and I have asthma, so I'm having a hard time breathing and am a bit out of it. The teachers decide that we'll just go outside and have an easy rest of the class doing football(soccer) practice. But it's a little bit warm today, and I overheat quite quickly. I don't ever do to good in the sun.

So we start doing different drills, and the gym teacher who was mentioned in the last authors note, the one that's really hot, was the one telling us the drills.

We'll call him Mark Webber for the sake of this story, because on the first day of school I no joke had to do a double take to confirm he wasn't Mark Webber.

We're on the first drill, and Mark Webber is explaining to another group how to kick the ball.

"You should position your body over the ball."

I have the sudden urge to turn to my friend and say "I'd position my body over his balls."

But I don't. Because I'm sensible.

And the sun hasn't gotten to me just yet.

Finally, the end of class rolls around, and we're on the last drill.

And the sun, my every day out of pocket-ness, lack of oxygen getting to my lungs, and delusion is starting to get to me.

This was a simple exercise: dribble the ball down the pitch, turn around, and shoot towards goal. Goal being the next person in lines legs.

But my group didn't quite understand.

"Excuse me, Mr. *his name*,"

"Yes?"

"Where are we supposed to kick the ball?"

"Oh, it should go between your legs."

...

"I'd let him go between my legs." I whisper to my friend (he'll be called John) (it's an inside joke). Oh my, I'm so funny!

Wait, why isn't John laughing? Why's he just starting at me?

Whatever.

I look down the pitch in time to see my other friend(she'll be called Lana, because of her huge love of Lana Del Rey. She's so real for that.) stop dead in her tracks, and turn around, staring at me with her mouth hanging wide open.

I get told pretty regularly that I'm very good at annunciating, and that I have a very loud voice.

That always came in handy when participating in Shakespeare club and other theater events. However, it didn't come in handy today.

However, not only had I just about SHOUTED THAT I WOULD LET THE GYM TEACHER GO BETWEEN MY LEGS, because that want humiliating enough, I had also said it before he had walked away from my group.

Meaning he was standing

Right.

Behind.

Me.

Great!

But maybe he didn't hear?

Yeah, thats what I was hoping for a while, but there have been a few different things that have happened to me that make me believe otherwise.