⌞ always the angel, never a god ⌝

⌞ eighteen : home? ⌝

"Race it hard, race it fast."

___

The morning after the race was always the worst because it meant it was time to go home. I didn't want to go home. I wanted to stay here or travel with Jules but that wasn't an option, it was never an option. 

With a sigh, I turned off my alarm and got myself out of bed. It was a slow walk to the window to open the shades and then decide to get dressed. It was something simple, something that would be comfortable to fly in. I ended up compromising with a pair of sweats and a cropped jumper. My things had been packed up last night so I wasn't worried about that. It made me feel like the time I had spent here was nothing. It went by within a blink of an eye. 

But it would be good to go home. I would get to see Carmen again, being back a school. All the normal parts of life would start up again. Training and such. I would make sure to keep up with the races but it wouldn't be the same as actually being at races and in the garage. 

"Hey, Lu." 

I looked up from my hands, forcing a smile as I saw Jules. "Hi." 

He gave me a soft smile back and walked over to me. He just held his arms open. knowing that I wasn't really big on hugs when I didn't feel good. I felt my lip quiver and I hid it by laying my head against his chest with my arms hanging at my side. He pulled me into a hug. 

"Oh, Lu. It'll be okay, darling. I'll see you again soon." 

"I know." 

"Leaving isn't a bad thing. You got to do a lot these couple weeks." 

I nodded and I could feel the tears stinging my eyes. I tried not to let them fall. I hated crying. Crying always meant that the punishment would be worse. There was never a reason to cry in Father's eyes. The only time you could cry was your wedding day, the day your kids were born, or when someone died. 

"And think. You made some friends." He snorted at that and it caused me to roll my eyes. 

"I don't think a world champion can be counted as a friend." 

"He gave you his personal number and said to text or call for anything." 

"Seems fatherly to me." 

Jules gasped as he looked down at me, faking an expression of hurt. "That's my job!" 

"I don't know, Lewis seems content on stealing it." 

Jules broke away from the hug but made sure to keep his hands on my arms. "Non, non. That will not stand!" 

I snorted and he gasped. "I got her to laugh! Ladies and gentlemen, I've done it!" 

"Okay, you don't need to create a scene." 

He laughed and pulled me back into the hug, sitting us both down on the edge of the bed. He looked down at me as he ran a comforting hand through my hair, twisting the rogue curls around his fingers. 

"All is going to be okay, Lu. I promise. And you know I'm always a text away." 

"I know."