Tinder | tayley ✓

Goodnight

Taylor forced himself to go on another Tinder date. He feared that it would not end in a similar way to his date with Hayley. In other words, no sex. But he needed something to occupy himself on an otherwise boring Saturday night. Instead of being at home binge-watching some bad TV show, he sat in the booth of a bar with Baylie, a girl whose name he had nearly forgotten multiple times. It helped that her name sounded remarkably similar to the last girl he had taken out on a date.

Taylor wanted to drink his pain away. Why not? He suggested the two of them play a game of Never Have I Ever, also known as an excuse for Taylor to drink.

"Never have I ever had sex in public," said his date. Taylor hesitated at first. Tell the truth? He let out a sigh and took a sip from his drink.

Baylie's eyes widened as she watched Taylor take a sip from the bottle.

"Never have I ever...visited another country," Taylor said. Very interesting one. Baylie took a sip from her bottle of alcohol.

"Never have I ever watched porn."

Taylor rolled his eyes and mumbled a "Come on," just before taking another sip from his drink.

"Never have I ever --" Taylor started but was cut off when he noticed an incoming call. He looked at his phone but forced it back into his pocket when he read "Hayley".

But quickly after his phone stopped its buzzing, a constant stream of text messages rolled in. He ignored them.

"Never have I ever sucked a dick," Taylor said. Even though his college days had been wild and he had almost sucked a dick, not quite. He wasn't that desperate for money.

Baylie took a sip from her beverage.

As Baylie was speaking, Taylor felt a constant vibration that indicated he was being called again.

"Hold on, I'm getting a call from, uh, from my mom. Can I take this outside and come back in a minute?"

His date nodded.

Taylor exited the bar and answered the phone when Hayley called him for the third time. He didn't bother checking the texts from her.

"What do you want?" Taylor impatiently asked. All that could be heard on the other end was a sniffle.

To get her attention he added an angry, "Hello?"

"Hey. I'm sorry to bother you, but I just wanted to hear your voice. I know you want as little to do with me as possible but can you...come over?" Her voice made it obvious that she had been crying.

Taylor let out a sigh and softly spoke, "I can't. I'm out on a date, Hayley. Besides, you know that this can't happen — whatever it is that's going on between us. We can't be together. I'll lose my job, as I've told you already. It's too risky. You should find someone else. Somebody your own age. Somebody who can be with you."

"You're not much older than me," Hayley said. "We can be together. We can make this work. Why don't you believe that?"

"Because that'll never happen," he angrily retorted.

Hayley didn't say a word in response. The only answer of any kind that Taylor received was Hayley hanging up on him.

At the end of the date — or by the time Baylie was too drunk to function — she recommended Taylor come home with her. He immediately declined. For one, she had drank to the point where Taylor felt as though he'd be taking advantage of her. In addition to that, he had more pressing matters to take care of. Baylie was too drunk to argue. Taylor, on the other hand, wasn't very intoxicated. Though his initial plan had been to drink, he could barely focus on his surroundings due to everything running through his mind.

After dropping Baylie off at her house (and promising a second date that he didn't imagine would actually happen) he rushed to Hayley's house. When he knocked on the door of her apartment, one of Hayley's roommates answered. Hayley was nowhere to be seen.

"Can I talk to Hayley?" He asked.

"Maybe. We'll see if she wants to see you at all."

And so her roommates checked on her. Moments later, Taylor was not greeted with an open door but instead received another call. This time, he answered.

"What?" Hayley asked as soon as Taylor answered.

"Just open the door so we can talk," Taylor requested.

But he quickly received a "No."

"Why did you hang up on me earlier?" Taylor asked.

"Because you were on a date."

"So?"

"Because it's not me that you want. I'm not special. All you ever wanted me to be was an easy fuck. I'm not ready to get hurt again."

"Just open the damn door, Hayley," Taylor repeated.

"No," Hayley answered again.

"Do you want us to be something? Open the fucking door."

The call ended when Taylor heard the door being unlocked and witnessed it being pushed open.

"What do you want?" Hayley instantly asked. Her cheeks and eyes were red, tears still running down her face.

"I like you. There, I said it," Taylor blurted out. Hayley remained speechless. She wouldn't even look at him, instead focusing her eyes on the ground.

"And you know what? I was afraid to admit that. I was afraid because I didn't want to lose my job, because I don't want to seem like some sort of creep, and because I'm scared of falling in love."

Hayley looked up at him with wide eyes. "You're...scared?" She asked hesitantly.

"Yes. I haven't been in a serious relationship since high school. I've slept around, sure, but that's different. I'm scared of commitment. And what happens if we break up, what then? What if you hate me? What if this isn't meant to be?"

"Stop with all of the 'what ifs'. Taylor, I like you, and if you like me, then why not? Why not make this happen?"

"Why not? Maybe because I can lose my job over this. Maybe because this may all end up being for nothing."

There was a silence before Taylor added, "Also, why did you think you aren't special? You are. I've had students flirt with me, I've always been creeped out by it. But it's different with you. I don't feel weird. Granted, we knew each other for certain reasons prior to the start of the semester, but still. You're special to me, Hayley. With that being said, I want you to realize that if something happens between us, if we do get together, we'll have to be secretive about us. No posting about our relationship on social media, no telling anyone that doesn't already know."

"So you'd be ashamed to be with me?" Hayley questioned.

Taylor quickly shook his head. "No, that's not what I meant. Look, just think about it tonight, okay? We can talk about it more tomorrow, or whenever. No reason to rush anything."

"No, I understand what you want. And what you want is not me," she said as more tears formed in her eyes.

"God, can I say one thing without upsetting you?" Taylor exclaimed.

Hayley rolled her eyes, stepped back into her apartment, and mumbled, "Goodnight."