Chapter 11: It's All My Fault

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"Winged one, wake up." Estrella awoke to Zephyr nudging her with his nose. She had a long, hard ride the day before and was stiff and sore all over as she rose to her feet. "Two more days," she told herself. Two days ride and she would reach the ancient city of Caylos, home to the courts of Tiberius. They were Dawn's allies, and would certainly receive her with open arms. Then there would be warm baths, and a soft bed, and rich foods...

"Estrella," Zephyr's voice pulled her out of the daydream and back into the real world. Her clothes were damp and covered in mud, she had sticks in her hair, and worst of all, she hadn't had a proper bath in two weeks. Even if she did manage to reach Caylos in 2 days, would they even believe that the mud splattered, dirty little girl that she was could possibly be the true heir to the throne of Dawn? How would she prove herself to them? "Yes Zephyr?" Estrella quickly pushed these thoughts out of her mind to focus on the situation at hand. If a dragon was sent to find her, there must be a good reason why. "I bring news of Dawn. Yesterday, Lord Reuben's men marched upon the fortress of Dusk, setting it on fire. There were no survivors. Tarvill sent me to find you and give you this." Zephyr placed the box he had been holding in his front claws in front of Estrella. Opening it, Estrella found the Sunblade and a note. "He also said to tell you that he loved you. While I was collecting the box, I also found this scroll which must have been left by one of our messengers."

"Thank you Zephyr" Estrella took one look at the scroll and broke into tears. "This is all my fault. I shouldn't have left the fortress. I should have gone and turned myself in. This attack was ordered by Reuben to draw me out of hiding. If I had stayed, if I had turned myself in, then this wouldn't have happened and Tarvill wouldn't be d-d-dead." Blinking the tears out of her eyes she looked up at Zephyr, handing him back the Sunblade as she did so "Leave me alone. Go back to Dawn. If Reuben wants the throne so much, then let him have it. I am no longer worthy of ever possibly ruling Dawn."

"Don't say such things Estrella." Zephyr pushed the Sunblade back at her. "You are needed in Dawn and I'm not leaving until you agree to come with me."

"Well than you can just stay here with me then, because I'm not going back to Dawn. I have made a rash decision, and others have suffered because of it. I hear by declare my self exiled from Dawn, never to return for the rest of my days."

"Estrella, find some sense in your head before I have to put some there myself." Zephyr's voice sounded annoyed, almost angry. "Were you the one who ordered the fortress to be burned? Were you one of them who threw the torches?"

"Well, no but-"

"If you didn't order the fortress to be burned, and you didn't go and burn it, then how is it your fault?" Zephyr's voice rose to a crescendo on the last few words, leaving Estrella visibly shaking in fear."

"If I hadn't run away, and had turned myself in instead, Reuben would not have been provoked to do such a thing."

"If you had stayed and waited for Reuben to come, or if you had turned yourself in, you would be dead by now and Tarvill likely would still be dead as well. You wouldn't last more than a night in his castle, and once you were dead, he'd find a reason to kill Tarvill as well. Those two have a history of not liking each other."

"So you are saying that anything else I did likely would have ended up with a similar result, one that may or may not have included my death as well?"

"Likely yes. There is a possibility that other options could have actually lead to both of you being alive, but we'll never know what could have been, only what has been. We need to stop dwelling on what could have been now, and move on to what to do about what has been done."

"Zephyr, can you please stop sounding like a philosopher? I'm still convinced that it's my fault and that I am unworthy to rule."

"Estrella, if only people who hadn't made mistakes could rule, than no one would be eligible to wear the crown. Worthiness is not about not making mistakes, its about what you do about them. We can't dwell on our mistakes, we learn from them and move on. Besides, if you don't rule Dawn, Reuben will, and I'm sure you'd do a better job than him."

"You're right. We wouldn't want Reuben ruling Dawn, would we?" Estrella stood up and soared quickly onto Zephyr's back. "I need to get back to Dawn and stop his plans."




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