1.20: sephine

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I'd finally managed to convince Cam that I was asleep, which wasn't all that hard because I just had to keep a straight face while having my eyes closed. I considered sleeping, but the conversation Cam and Hayes were having outside the door was enough to keep me awake.

"Where did you go?" Cam questions after shutting my door.

I carefully get out of bed to hear Hayes response, "Is she okay?" He asks before answering Cam's question. "Fine. I went to Tessa's, now will you just tell me if she's okay?" Hayes went to see Tessa?

"Yeah, she's sleeping now, but I'm really worried about her. Did she really throw-"

Hayes pauses, "Yes, Seph threw her phone." I glance over to the wall that has a new dent from the force of the phone. It lays in a shattered mess on the floor, but at least I'm not looking at another picture of Ethan and I's glory days. I don't know how she managed to get those photos, but I'm sick of it.

"Are you okay?" Cam then asks, and I officially feel like the worst person in the world. He has his own fucked up issues with Tessa, and he still went there.

"I'm fucking great." Except Hayes isn't. I've spent enough time with him the past few months to know that the tightness in his voice is him trying to control himself.

The door jostles slightly, but no one comes in, and I contemplate getting back in the bed just in case one of them come in here, "You can't go in there right now like this. What happened?"

"Do you know anything about what happened in Seattle?" Hayes asks, and I feel my stomach drop a little.

"I figured if anyone knew it would be you."

"Tessa is threatening Sephine by holding what happened over her head. I can't do anything because the one thing that Tessa wants, I can't give to her." She wants me to break up with Hayes, but I don't know what she would have asked Hayes for.

"She's threatening Sephine?" Cam's voice is shaky.

"She called them suggestions, but I never actually saw them because Seph threw her phone." I curl my hands and wince slightly as my nails dig into my palms. I'm such an idiot for thinking that Tessa would just let everything go, but throwing my phone probably wasn't the smartest idea. "I think she should be done for now, I don't know how to help."

It's silent for a few moments, "I think that you need to tell her what happened with you and Tessa if you want Sephine to open up. You gotta give a little to get a little."

"That's not just a little Cam."

"Just consider it, I'm supposed to meet Liv for lunch, so I have to go, but let me know if anything changes." It registers in my mind a half-second later, but I've just climbed onto my bed when Hayes opens the door, not surprised at all to see me still awake.

"You were never sleeping, were you?" He asks, and I shake my head. "So, I'm assuming you heard all of that?"

"You didn't have to go there."

His gaze is unwavering as he speaks, "Yeah, I did."

My mouth feels dry, "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," Hayes says, but I don't believe him.

I climb off the bed to get closer to him, and for once I make the first move by hugging him tightly, "I'm sorry."

He doesn't hesitate to wrap his arms around me, but he also doesn't say anything. This seems to be the routine; we pretend to be okay until eventually, one of us loses our shit, and today that happened to be me.

I grip his shirt tightly, and I don't let go. "I'm sorry," I just keep mumbling it over and over into his chest while he doesn't let go. I'm not sure whose benefit I'm apologizing for: mine or Hayes's.

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