Beyond His Green Eyes| ✓

Inure

Inure; accept or grow accustomed to something undesirable.

C H A P T E R    F O U R T Y - T H R E E

"What? Why?" I exclaimed, expressing my worry.

"Why do you think?" he muttered, plopping down next to me on the bed.

I sighed as I turned to him, realizing the more than obvious reason. "She wanted to know about what happened and you didn't want to tell her about Cassie."

"Yeah," he said, giving a stifled laugh.

"Chris, you were dating her from the past thirteen months, I think it's very reasonable for her to ask you that," I voiced my opinion as my brother nodded along.

"You're right. It is reasonable for her to ask me, but I'm not ready to talk about it yet. It's just...it's-"

"Too soon? Chris, stop saving yourself with that excuse. It's been two years. If you keep it all bottled up inside, you're never going to be able to make any relationship work and trust me, talking to people really helps," I explained while he sat there, seemingly contemplating something that I didn't know about.

"You're talking as if you're experienced," he scoffed at me. It was then I recollected that he had no idea that Noah knew everything. For some odd reason, a small fear set up shop inside me as the thought of telling Chris the truth crossed my mind. I had known him long and well enough to have an idea of what kind of reaction I would get when he did come to know. Nevertheless, I decided to not delay the process and get it over with.

"I do have an experience," I mumbled quietly.

"Dr. Arden does not count," he answered taking my statement the wrong way.

"That's not what I am talking about, I told Noah everything."

"What?" he yelled. "What the hell do you mean by that?"

I reminded myself every second to stick to my calm. I wasn't in a mood to pick a fight with anyone and especially not him. But the way this argument was escalating, I reckoned it was only a matter of minutes before it turned into a fight. "Exactly what I said. I told him everything except the whole reason behind my nightmares."

"Why would you do something so impulsive? So you come to college and just spill everything to the first guy you see?" he raged, his clenched jaw clearly displaying his prominent jawline. Even though he had spoken the statement in a position of anger, it had been freakishly true. Noah was the first guy that I had seen when I entered university.

"It wasn't impulsive. He has gone through some tough shit too and he understands," I spoke in defense not allowing him to mark my decision as something that was merely an impulse. "And you have to start opening up in a relationship, otherwise your significant other is only going to feel that you don't trust her."

"Well, forgive me if I don't open up about the worst parts of my life to someone I have been dating for a little over two months!"

"You're speaking out of line now, Chris. You don't know what it's like between us. Also, it's been two whole years since she passed away, maybe you should try and move on."

"I can't. I can't just forget that I had a sister like you did and be happy with the new people in my life," he argued, his voice low. I tried with all my might to sideline his tone towards me but failed.

I stood up from the bed, a thousand thoughts running through my mind at once as I faced him. "Just because I moved on does not mean for even one second that I forgot her. Forgetting and moving on isn't the same thing, at least not in this case. Don't accuse me of something wrong because you're hurting," he sighed hearing me. "Chris, you have to try and move past this. If you let it cloud everything going on in your life, you're gonna develop major trust issues," I told him calmly, taking his hand in mine as he didn't bother replying for a while.