What's Been Going On With You

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Lucy watched Jess trying to fix his car. She didn't understand out of all places he had car trouble in, it had to be this town. She was wrong about him. About what she hoped he would achieve.

Jess caught her staring and frowned. Lucy glared before quickly looking away. He scoffed before putting his tools down and walking over to her.

"Whats the matter with you." he spoke as he stood before her. Lucy looked up at him and frowned, "Nothing, I'm great." she spat.

"What a load of crap."

"Oh yeah?"

"Whatever," he went to walk away, "just next time watch where you're guilt glares go-" he said and looked at her.

"What, can't stand the thought of someone hating you for your decisions?" she quickly followed after him.

"No just tired of hearing it," he shot back as he walked. Lucy looked down upset, "Why are you being like this."

"Why are you being like this." he retorted.

Lucy looked at him, "I'm not talking until you do." she stood firm. He sighed before looking at her.

________

"You've been looking for your dad..?" she looked up from the lake. Jess stared at the water, "..Yeah somewhat..Not at first but.."

She looked at him. "What happened that night, Jess." She asked him.

Jess looked at Lucy with a shame in his eyes she had seen before in herself. He looked back down at the water. "I went back to school, and the principle told me I was flunking. Said I had to be held back."

Lucy felt a wash of guilt come over her. "Y-you weren't that behind were you?" She said but to no reply.

Jess exhaled stiffly and continued, "And then I couldn't tell Rory about it-I knew how she'd get.." he rubbed his head, "And then I couldn't find you-at the party-I -I made some wrong moves that night.."

She was ready to yell at him for picking a fight but stopped herself. She made some wrong moves that night too.

"So you left?"

"No.. Luke told me I had to go. I don't blame him. I had been a colossal jerk." He said. Lucy sighed. At least he was admitting to it. "But I couldn't bring myself to say goodbye to anyone.. it was too embarrassing too real."

"And then I found my dad.. went to go stay with him.."

"How'd that work out?"

"We're better off distanced.." he left it at that. Lucy looked down and readjusted herself on the bridge. "I know why you didnt.. But I really wished you had talked to me Jess. I wish you had said something I would have understood."

"Yeah well if I do that you'll expect it all the time now." He tried joking in poor taste.

Lucy looked down at her hands "Things have sucked here without you Jess. It's like you're haunting this place."

Jess looked at her finally, "This place? Or you." he said. Lucy stayed silent. "Why are you holding on Lucy? I don't understand why you think I'm so great."

"I dont understand why you don't." she said. She looked him in the eyes finally, "Jess, it's like you're trying to make me hate you the way you hate yourself." she said, "You're good at it, but it doesn't work..." Lucy exhaled, "You've showed to much of yourself to prove it wrong." she said, "I see good in you."

"You see the good in everybody." he retorted. "Even when it's not there." Jess looked her in the eyes. Lucy's gaze faltered and she stared back at the water. Jess was confused, he never won her stare downs, "Lucy."

"Hm."

"Whats been going on with you." he said. 

Lucy looked up at him. She leaned on his shoulder and held onto his hand tightly, "I just missed you." she said. 

Jess looked down at her and saw her hand in his. He looked down. He did like it, but he felt like he wasn't there yet. He didn't deserve this. 


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