Turn Your Face

Empty Space

While stretching the tight-fitted shirt over my head back in my bedroom, I couldn't help but look over my shoulder at the woman making eye contact with me through my mirror. Her hand rested delicately under her chin while her hair, wet from assisting me in the shower, was draped loosely over her right shoulder. I followed her wavy hair to the lines of her face, how her mouth was outlined by small curves that met her dimples whenever deep in thought. Her piercing blue eyes which radiated flecks of white from her pupils smiled at me, regardless of the situation, turning upwards at their ends. Her lips, idyllic in their form, parted perfectly allowing her bottom lip to appear to have a permanent pout. That pout, which against my neck felt of succulence and passion, riddled my brain with memory after memory of her lips on my skin. The way they traced down my body slowly but intentionally, leaving markers of her loving candor.

"Emily? Earth to Emily?" I snapped out of my staring to find Alison now standing just a few feet in front of me, waving her hand back and forth.

"Oh, hey..." my voice trailed, turning myself forward back toward my mirror. I began flattening my shirt down around my stomach, nervously fidgeting as Alison continued to stare.

Her hands rose to the top of my towel which was precariously spun in my hair. Her fingers danced around it to untangle from my hair, which fell damp from its wrapping around my shoulders. While still glancing down to the ground, Alison reached around the front of my body to grab the hairbrush lying on my dresser. Moving back towards my hair, she paused to place a kiss on my right cheek, lingering a few seconds too long which to me could only mean, 'I love you.' She started at the root of my hair before running the brush to its tip, working diligently through every few inches until my hair rested straight along my back.

"There you go." She reassured, running her hands down both of my arms. "You. Look. Radiant."

I nodded slowly in response, watching her face fall as she witnessed her assistance not being appropriately appreciated.

"Hey, Em?" I spun around to face her, her fingers lacing through mine as I leaned forward against her shoulder. "You know you can do this, right Emily? I know that you can make it through this, but do you know?" I shook my head against her shoulder while her arm slinked around my waist. "Love bug, can you look up at me?" I moved my head off of Alison's shoulder to meet her eyes, feeling her arm remain steady on my waist. She caught the tear falling off my cheek with her thumb. "Tell me what you're thinking."

"I can't slow my brain down. I can't stop it from racing. It keeps going and going without my control." I paused, gasping for air to continue. With Alison's arm still wrapped tightly around me, our faces sat about 6 inches from each other as I continued in a hushed whisper, "But, at the same time, everything around me is moving so glacially. I look at you for what feels like a brief moment, and before I know it, you're right in front of me. It's like time is jumping, and I can't control it." I put my palms just above Alison's chest to push away from her, walking past her to fall onto my bed.

She turned to face me exasperated, "Em, it's not going to happen overnight." She sighed, sitting down next to my feet.

Rolling onto my back, I continued, "But, Al, I need to control something. I need something to control."

Her arm draped across my legs to reassure me, "Okay... And how have you tried to get through it today?"

"I focused on you. Your every movement and touch." I sat up, meeting our hands together.

She tilted her head to the side questioning my response, her left dimple crinkling as she smiled, "And has that worked okay?"

"Better than anything else I've tried," I replied as she leaned forward, placing her hands on either side of me before kissing me gently, sighing against my lips. My bottom lip met her pout as she parted her lips to grasp me between her kiss. As we leaned away, my eyes remained closed continuing to imagine the pressure of her lips upon mine.