It wasn't meant to be you

Chapter nineteen

I saw the car coming towards me and it hit me, hard. I fell on the road and saw everything blurry, I remember you, begging me to wake up, worry in your voice, desperation, I remember people crowding all around me, I remember the ambulance, how they picked me up in a bed and took me to a hospital, all the people that were directing me to emergencies, the oxygen mask on me, how it felt. I blacked out on my way to emergencies, none of that mattered though, the only thing I thought about was you.

I don't know how long I stayed in that hospital bed, the last thing I remember thinking is you.

-Chris-

The first week was unbearable, I was the reason she was in a coma, if I had just stayed with her that night none of this would have happened. I wish I would have been the one the car hit. I wish I could've saved her. I had finally found the one for me, and now, because of me, she was in a coma, and I didn't know for sure if she was going to wake up. I had lost my reason to live, I was sad all the time, I slowly fell into depression, I wouldn't talk to anyone, barely listen in school. I drifted away from everyone and everything around me.

I visited her everyday, talked to her, told her that I missed her, that I would be right there when she woke up, that I needed her. I came to the hospital that day, like any other. One week and two days had passed

"Good morning Chris" Doctor Stevens had said to me

"Good morning doctor" I answered "how is she doing today?"

"Go and see for yourself"

"Thanks doctor" I wondered if she was doing okay, he wouldn't tell me if she was getting better, she just told me to visit her, maybe he was telling me that ti avoid telling me that she was getting worse. I hoped not.

I held her hand tightly

"Good morning princess" I smiled at her, every time I waited for her to smile back, but she never did. "I brought a book today, your favorite: The Great Gatsby" I read two chapters to her, until nurse Susan came to give her a daily stretch.

"How are you Chris?" She asked me, she had a caring tone in her voice, she always had. I felt sure that she was taking care of Emma for me, I knew she was in good hands.

"Getting there"

"Don't be too hard in yourself Chris, she'll get better" she smiled warmly at me

"I hope so nurse, but if she does, I'll be the first person you call right? I'll know when she's awake?"

"Of course, the doctors will call her parents but I will make sure to call you"

"Thank you" I was happy that she has reassured me that I would know, if- when she woke up, I would be there to hold her hand and comfort her.

One week and three days, the days seemed to pass like months, each day felt longer than the other. And what pained me the most, was knowing that it wasn't my decision, any of it, if she woke up, if she didn't, if they had to take her away. Her parents decided that, and I couldn't do anything about it.