A Wish Granted

Chapter 3

I woke up again, and this time I was more prepared. I silently said a prayer to all gods and goddesses out there, to let me wake up seeing my cracked ceiling. Even though that ceiling was crack, there's nothing more that I want than to see it once again. 

I willed myself again and again encouraging my heart , that it's fine,  all I need to do was open my eyes. 

Easy...

I opened it... and I was still in that damned room.  The only difference is the sunlight blaring through the curtains that sets a warm touch inside this very luxurious room. 

Oh! and the stranger in the bed was nowhere to be seen. 

I covered my eyes with my arm... Or is it my arm?  this body's arm... to be precise....As I tried my best to regulate my breathing...

I didn't know breathing can actually become a chore for me.

It can't be real right?  I mean... No way...

All my logic, brain, heart, soul, everything instilled by my parents,  friends, teachers, society the community and my common sense refuse to acknowledge that transmigrating into a new world is possible.

It was one of those wish you have but firmly know it's impossible to happen. In the first place that's why it's an "I wish" not an "I hope" sentence. 

A few minutes passed or maybe an hour, who knows?  who cares? 

I can still smell the vomit beside the bed and it makes me want to vomit again. 

I groaned as I prop myself sitting up in this big and soft bed.

I look around again and again,  as if memorizing every single details inside the room.  I touch the soft bedsheet below me,  and I took a deep breath as the feeling of softness and silkiness invade my sense of touch...

Everything seems so real.  The smell,  the sensation,  the view,  and even the warm sunlight that passes through the curtains hitting my body feels warm.

So it's real??

I pinch myself and it hurt... Even the pain from my lower half is still there, and my head is still painfully throbbing.

I felt lost, confused... I was not even bothered how I was naked,  how I just lost my first time to a stranger, well not really my first time...this body's first time to be exact...

I could not think properly.

My trance was broken when I suddenly felt nauseous. This time I got up from the bed as fast as I could and run to the bathroom. I stumbled many times as I cursed inside my head. 

It hurts like hell!!

I feel like someone just took a knife and slice my private part into half!! My stomach was uncomfortable and I felt sticky everywhere.

I limp/ almost crawled until I reached the toilet where another round of vomiting happened.

I was crying, sobbing, choking on my own vomit. I didn't even care how pitiful I sound like or how disgusting I look like right now.

I leaned my head onto the toilet bowl, my hair touching the toilet seat as I vomit. 

I didn't care,  I don't even know why I was crying. For the pain?  or maybe because I was so frustrated and lost but still I don't know where the heck should I start and what should I do. 

I'm not even making any sense.

I slump into the toilet bowl,  sobbing and crying my eyes out.  My head was pounding everywhere and my body hurts like hell as if a car just run into me.  I decided that I would cry all my tears out and once I'm done...then I'll decide what to do next. 

Minutes or maybe hours passed by.  I cried until my voice was hoarse and my eyes hurt.  When I felt like I have emptied out all of my frustrations.  I slowly stood up,  my legs were numb for sitting so long in the same position.

I look at my new self in the mirror.  Red puffy eyes,  red nose and pale face...

Fudge,  how can she still look beautiful after all that crying?

I wanted to cry again.

I look towards the bathtub and decided to take a shower. I felt sticky and smelly,  it actually surprised me how I could last that long without bathing.  I was very particular when it comes to taking a shower every time I felt dirty,  before I sleep,  whenever I sweat too much... and the moment I woke up. 

My mother,  the one who took care of us in the orphanage, used to joke that the water bill being high was my fault, for taking three baths a day.  I mean, I can't blame me, I sweat too easily and too much in my original body.  Sometimes I wonder if there's something wrong with my sweat glands.

My mother... and the children in the orphanage... I wonder how they are??

I felt the rim of my eyes starting to water again. 

No!  

I can't cry!

I need to get a grip on myself or else I won't be able to move forward and nothing would happen. 

I walk into the shower and immediately took a hot bath. I felt a stinging pain between my legs but I tried to ignore it.

I used to ask myself how the protagonist on those transmigration stories adapt so fast. 

Now I know...

they adapt not because their geniuses, it's because they are left with no other choice but to do so. 

I have once felt this way before... 

When my parents died in a car crush and I was sent to the orphanage when I was six. This was the exact feeling that I had.

Facing the reality,  I needed to brace myself, at the same time accept the fact that my parents are gone and move on,  I needed to adapt to my new environment and live my own life.

Maybe it's one of the basic human instincts,  to adapt to any situations their put in and try to survive, and that's exactly what I'm gonna do now. 

I will take one step at a time. 

I need to do this!