All She Can Take

F O R T Y - E I G H T

"Excuse me, I just need to..." The nurse inched toward her, politely trying to clear her from the area. Sid was sure that she had probably asked her to move multiple times but her mind was in another world.

"I'm sorry." She scooted over to the side and stood out of the way without taking her eyes off of him. They had just gotten Phil into a room and allowed her up to see him. Stitches held the split skin on his chin together. Bulbous purple flesh sealed his eye shut. A swollen lip kept his mouth from closing naturally. Beneath the white sheets, more stitches closed the wound where the doctors performed surgery to repair his spleen.

In the waiting room, she thought that they would come out any minute and tell her that they'd lost him. She steeled herself for that. Trying for once to get ahead of the loss before it sneak-attacked her. But instead, they let her know that he had a long recovery ahead of him but he would make it back to himself. She let relief settle over her and just as it did she felt her fear take a back seat and her anger ramp up.

The nurse adjusted Phil's IV before leaving and Sid crept back over to his side. With all the painkillers she was pretty sure he wouldn't be awake and coherent for a while but she wanted him to know she was there. She laced her fingers through his and pulled a chair close to the side of his bed. She rested her head on his hand a breathed in the scent of him. Under all the sterile scents she still found his. Even with her eyes closed the injuries to him danced behind her eyelids. It was unreal to think that his own flesh and blood did this to him. The older brother who was supposed to be like a father to him had left him on a sidewalk beaten within an inch of his life. He did this to Phil. The last person on earth who deserved something like this.

She hated Kru on an entirely new level. Fuel had been added to the simmering anger of her father's death and was now an inferno. She had to get rid of him. This one person was so destructive and damaging. It wouldn't change her circumstance, what happened to her and her family could not be undone but him being dead would stop others from being hurt. Killing him would wipe out the ability for him to decimate other lives.

She would find him and tear him away from this earth the same way he'd done to so many. Sid made up her mind. She wiped the tears from her eyes and kissed Phil's hand before she got up. Her foot had barely crossed the threshold into the bright hallway when she heard a groan from inside the room.

She turned around quickly unsure that she heard correctly. When she turned she saw Phil, slowing moving his hand to his throat and groaning. Sid moved to his side in a flash. His eyes were still closed.

"Phil?" She whispered. His one eye that was able to, popped open quickly. In the next moment, tears were rolling down the side of his face soaking the pillow. Sid panicked.

"Are you hurting? I can get a nurse. I'll get a nurse now." Sid went to step away but Phil grabbed onto her hand. She stopped and watched him anxiously. Wanting to do something to take his pain away but not knowing what. Phil struggled to swallow and speak over his swollen lip but his voice came through weak and cracked.

"He...hurt...you." He squeezed her hand with all the strength he could muster. Sid came closer and met his eyes.

"No, he didn't hurt me. I'm okay."

"I thought...he hurt you. I didn't know..." The tears kept coming as he continued to squeeze Sid's hand and pull her closer like he wanted to feel her and make sure she was real. That she was there.

It hadn't occurred to Sid that while she was worried to death about him he was in the same purgatory. Not knowing whether Kru was crazy enough to harm her as well. Tears poured down on Phil from Sid's eyes. Something was overwhelming about her imagining him bloodied, broken, and bruised and held hostage but worrying more about her and whether she was safe. Sid buried her head in the covers. She felt Phil's hand on her chin, lifting her face to his. It pained her to look at him but she met his eyes. She didn't know what to say. What was appropriate? What would fix them in their brokenness right now? She swallowed hard and held his gaze before she spoke.